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Tired of talking to people who do not understand!!!
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<blockquote data-quote="Fran" data-source="post: 401643" data-attributes="member: 3"><p>Hi and welcome. I don't know how old your child is. Could you do a profile signature so we have some background info? Thanks. </p><p>Our son's doctor said (when difficult child was 12)that the labels/diagnosis that are given is the best they can do with the information that we have at present. As science knows more, the diagnosis' will be fine tuned. We work on the problems and not worry about the labels too much. If my difficult child had an adhd diagnosis I tried to learn what the mindset is so that I could help him manage his obstacles. When we had atypical bipolar not otherwise specified, I learned everything I can learn about that and when we got AS or Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD), I learned a lot about that diagnosis. My difficult child is 26 and he is not a clear cut anything but he has many obstacles. He is pretty independent with supports in place. Not working but learning and growing. </p><p>Risperadol was a big help for my difficult child. It was the single most effective medication he took. He has weight gain. It was the choice between functioning or obesity. I chose to go with functioning and help him work on the obesity. </p><p></p><p>Ignorance of what special needs classes really are is getting better but there are still people who look from the outside of our world and think they know something more than those who deal with difficult child's. Don't take their advice. Be polite, pretend to listen and do what is in the best interest of your child. You owe NO ONE an explanation of what you chose for your son. Get support from parents who have walked in your shoes. </p><p>Your role as difficult child's parent is to advocate for him to be in the right situation to learn and to overcome his obstacles to be an independent, tax paying, law abiding adult or as close to independent as he can become. Everyone else's view of parenting is of no consequence. </p><p>Quit sharing the day to day struggle with people who are negative. You will find that there are a lot of people who know what's best for your child but only you see him and his struggles. Do what your child needs and ignore the rest. None of the do gooders stay to help your child have a better day. No one pitches in to give you a break. They are just talk. You will sleep better and have no regrets that you didn't do everything possible to help your child if you look to him for the direction you need to take. </p><p></p><p>I often think that if I had as many obstacles and challenges as my difficult child, that I wouldn't even get out of bed. He continues to get up every day and try. He didn't succeed for most of those days but there were successes interspersed with set backs. Just keep asking yourself "what does he need to over come today's issues". No one else's input will guide you nearly as well as your instinctual maternal drive to raise your child to adulthood. Plus educating yourself.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Fran, post: 401643, member: 3"] Hi and welcome. I don't know how old your child is. Could you do a profile signature so we have some background info? Thanks. Our son's doctor said (when difficult child was 12)that the labels/diagnosis that are given is the best they can do with the information that we have at present. As science knows more, the diagnosis' will be fine tuned. We work on the problems and not worry about the labels too much. If my difficult child had an adhd diagnosis I tried to learn what the mindset is so that I could help him manage his obstacles. When we had atypical bipolar not otherwise specified, I learned everything I can learn about that and when we got AS or Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD), I learned a lot about that diagnosis. My difficult child is 26 and he is not a clear cut anything but he has many obstacles. He is pretty independent with supports in place. Not working but learning and growing. Risperadol was a big help for my difficult child. It was the single most effective medication he took. He has weight gain. It was the choice between functioning or obesity. I chose to go with functioning and help him work on the obesity. Ignorance of what special needs classes really are is getting better but there are still people who look from the outside of our world and think they know something more than those who deal with difficult child's. Don't take their advice. Be polite, pretend to listen and do what is in the best interest of your child. You owe NO ONE an explanation of what you chose for your son. Get support from parents who have walked in your shoes. Your role as difficult child's parent is to advocate for him to be in the right situation to learn and to overcome his obstacles to be an independent, tax paying, law abiding adult or as close to independent as he can become. Everyone else's view of parenting is of no consequence. Quit sharing the day to day struggle with people who are negative. You will find that there are a lot of people who know what's best for your child but only you see him and his struggles. Do what your child needs and ignore the rest. None of the do gooders stay to help your child have a better day. No one pitches in to give you a break. They are just talk. You will sleep better and have no regrets that you didn't do everything possible to help your child if you look to him for the direction you need to take. I often think that if I had as many obstacles and challenges as my difficult child, that I wouldn't even get out of bed. He continues to get up every day and try. He didn't succeed for most of those days but there were successes interspersed with set backs. Just keep asking yourself "what does he need to over come today's issues". No one else's input will guide you nearly as well as your instinctual maternal drive to raise your child to adulthood. Plus educating yourself. [/QUOTE]
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