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<blockquote data-quote="lovemysons" data-source="post: 552613" data-attributes="member: 3305"><p>I definitely have pressure on me to be "medication-free". </p><p>My husband has said to me several times over the past 5 yrs that I am no longer the "vibrant woman that he married". It really gets to me. Now I don't like having to take the Abilify...but I WILL NEVER have a psychotic breakdown again if I can help it! Yes, the medications are terribly expensive and I have a HUGE LACK OF ENERGY. But I am not emotionally on the brink of suicide once a month or so intense that logic makes no sense. I like the way I feel now...I feel "normal". </p><p>Sadly, even my easy child daughter is not so happy about mom being on medications either. And my oldest difficult child is just plain afraid of mental illness. I guess they all were used to my extremes and liked it??? Go figure. I certainly was more driven once upon a time and alot more "help to everyone"...but at WHAT PRICE???</p><p>Anyway...</p><p></p><p>In regards to trading addictions...Oh ya, I can see where it's true. No drinking...then non stop on CD Board, lol. No drinking...then I'm at the casino. Though, husband only gives me what we are willing to risk when I go to the casino and I do not take credit cards or a check book...so I only have what I take with me. It's "controlled behavior by outside forces" if you will. </p><p></p><p>I also used to be a perfectionist. And I mean mint perfect! Our house stayed in "ready to sell" condition 24/7 for yrs as I was a compulsive cleaner/decorator. I am no longer compelled in this way due to Abilify now, ttL. </p><p></p><p>LMS</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="lovemysons, post: 552613, member: 3305"] I definitely have pressure on me to be "medication-free". My husband has said to me several times over the past 5 yrs that I am no longer the "vibrant woman that he married". It really gets to me. Now I don't like having to take the Abilify...but I WILL NEVER have a psychotic breakdown again if I can help it! Yes, the medications are terribly expensive and I have a HUGE LACK OF ENERGY. But I am not emotionally on the brink of suicide once a month or so intense that logic makes no sense. I like the way I feel now...I feel "normal". Sadly, even my easy child daughter is not so happy about mom being on medications either. And my oldest difficult child is just plain afraid of mental illness. I guess they all were used to my extremes and liked it??? Go figure. I certainly was more driven once upon a time and alot more "help to everyone"...but at WHAT PRICE??? Anyway... In regards to trading addictions...Oh ya, I can see where it's true. No drinking...then non stop on CD Board, lol. No drinking...then I'm at the casino. Though, husband only gives me what we are willing to risk when I go to the casino and I do not take credit cards or a check book...so I only have what I take with me. It's "controlled behavior by outside forces" if you will. I also used to be a perfectionist. And I mean mint perfect! Our house stayed in "ready to sell" condition 24/7 for yrs as I was a compulsive cleaner/decorator. I am no longer compelled in this way due to Abilify now, ttL. LMS [/QUOTE]
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