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Transitioning: childhood to adulthood+ - a repost
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<blockquote data-quote="hearts and roses" data-source="post: 60746" data-attributes="member: 2211"><p><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: busywend</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I have a bit of a different thought process on the dad figure and way of parenting. I think a dad is meant to be different than a mom. I think it is natural. It is hard for a mom to get why a dad acts/reacts the way he does because it is so different from our way - and our way is of course right. :wink:</p><p></p><p>This is something difficult child learned when she went to live with her dad. She had missed 'daddy parenting' all her life as he was disney dad on the weekends. Wow - was it different and difficult for her. He was sooooo mean - her words. He was just parenting in his way. I am not saying dads and moms are always right or do the best thing while parenting, but I do think nature wanted kids to have 2 different types of parenting. I think my difficult child had a disservice by only having a moms way of parenting all those years. </p><p>Can you imagine if she never had a dads way? She would leave her husband the minute he tried to discipline her kids - it would be so foreign to her.</div></div></p><p></p><p>Yes, I agree with this. I didn't for a while. I always thought being on the same page meant doing it the same. I was wrong. There are times when I like H to pick up the slack for me or step in when I obviously am not handling things well. I also think that for my H, difficult child's stepdad, it's slightly different than if her bio dad was doing the parenting. That is a whole other story and one to be explored at some point I'm sure. He's been the vacation dad and the disney dad, as you say. He wants difficult child to go live with him for a few weeks and while the thought of it makes me quake in my boots, I'm thinking it may not be such a bad thing. </p><p></p><p>But anyway, yeah, I think the differences in perspectives creates a nice balance at times. Even if it makes me want to punch him in the nose! LOL</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="hearts and roses, post: 60746, member: 2211"] <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: busywend</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I have a bit of a different thought process on the dad figure and way of parenting. I think a dad is meant to be different than a mom. I think it is natural. It is hard for a mom to get why a dad acts/reacts the way he does because it is so different from our way - and our way is of course right. [img]:wink:[/img] This is something difficult child learned when she went to live with her dad. She had missed 'daddy parenting' all her life as he was disney dad on the weekends. Wow - was it different and difficult for her. He was sooooo mean - her words. He was just parenting in his way. I am not saying dads and moms are always right or do the best thing while parenting, but I do think nature wanted kids to have 2 different types of parenting. I think my difficult child had a disservice by only having a moms way of parenting all those years. Can you imagine if she never had a dads way? She would leave her husband the minute he tried to discipline her kids - it would be so foreign to her.</div></div> Yes, I agree with this. I didn't for a while. I always thought being on the same page meant doing it the same. I was wrong. There are times when I like H to pick up the slack for me or step in when I obviously am not handling things well. I also think that for my H, difficult child's stepdad, it's slightly different than if her bio dad was doing the parenting. That is a whole other story and one to be explored at some point I'm sure. He's been the vacation dad and the disney dad, as you say. He wants difficult child to go live with him for a few weeks and while the thought of it makes me quake in my boots, I'm thinking it may not be such a bad thing. But anyway, yeah, I think the differences in perspectives creates a nice balance at times. Even if it makes me want to punch him in the nose! LOL [/QUOTE]
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