Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Trying to stay strong
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 660745" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>okie girl, there is a certain kind of peace that comes with just writing them letters or postcards while they are in jail.</p><p></p><p>I know your son isn't there yet, but I will tell you that until my Difficult Child starting doing better (one year ago), the times he was in jail were the best times for me. He was in a jail 8 or 9 times over the 6 years that were the worst. </p><p></p><p>I knew he was relatively safe, compared with living on the streets, and had food to eat and a way to take a shower and heat in the winter. That helped me, knowing that.</p><p></p><p>I stopped putting money on his account because i found out they all played cards and bet their account money, which I felt was just going for nothing, most times. </p><p></p><p>At the beginning, I did it all, sent books from Amazon, put money on the account, went for visits, wrote lots of letters.</p><p></p><p>At the end, I was down to just writing a postcard every now and then, with no "you'd better use this time to...." type of lectures. Just newsy postcards that started and ended with I love you and I hope you are okay, and telling him general things about my life.</p><p></p><p>That helped me too.</p><p></p><p>hang in there. Live YOUR life. You can be sure he is living his right now. Don't give away your life to him or his decisions. Our "kids" are grown men. Either they can act like grown men, and we will be able to have relationships with them at some point, we hope, or they can keep on acting like little babies and basically, nobody will want to have a relationship with them. Their choice, their consequence. Sad as it is.</p><p></p><p>Warm hugs today.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 660745, member: 17542"] okie girl, there is a certain kind of peace that comes with just writing them letters or postcards while they are in jail. I know your son isn't there yet, but I will tell you that until my Difficult Child starting doing better (one year ago), the times he was in jail were the best times for me. He was in a jail 8 or 9 times over the 6 years that were the worst. I knew he was relatively safe, compared with living on the streets, and had food to eat and a way to take a shower and heat in the winter. That helped me, knowing that. I stopped putting money on his account because i found out they all played cards and bet their account money, which I felt was just going for nothing, most times. At the beginning, I did it all, sent books from Amazon, put money on the account, went for visits, wrote lots of letters. At the end, I was down to just writing a postcard every now and then, with no "you'd better use this time to...." type of lectures. Just newsy postcards that started and ended with I love you and I hope you are okay, and telling him general things about my life. That helped me too. hang in there. Live YOUR life. You can be sure he is living his right now. Don't give away your life to him or his decisions. Our "kids" are grown men. Either they can act like grown men, and we will be able to have relationships with them at some point, we hope, or they can keep on acting like little babies and basically, nobody will want to have a relationship with them. Their choice, their consequence. Sad as it is. Warm hugs today. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Trying to stay strong
Top