Victim Mentality can be a serious issue. Unfortunately, it can be a by-product of self help type groups. A person becomes immersed in the belief that they are helpless, that they are a perennial victim and others are to blame for their actions. So, it can be the opposite of the desired outcome which is to deal with the past to empower the person going forward. The internet blog may be an attention seeking activity. You don't necessarily need to deal with it - the internet is a place of fantasy for many people, sadly, to many, their cyber fantasies can become confused with real memories. I would stop reading those blogs, they're causing you pain. I know this is hard as it's one of the few connections to her, but it isn't healthy for you. If you can't go 'cold turkey', at least consider a break. Use your faith to prevent yourself from peeking.
So, should you reach out again? Yes, things always change and you never know what is happening with her own daughters and when she begins to identify your parenting traits within herself, but you'll also have to respect her decision if she doesn't want to engage. As her mother, you should play the 'adult' role in seeking reconciliation. Children sometimes have trouble with letting go, responsible adults know that skill. If you have a breakthrough, here's some thoughts on handling the victim mentality. You should empathize with pain caused by actual events, but you should never allow a falsehood to stand as fact. She may become combative and insist, victims often insist on their victimization - some may have internalized false events to the point of believing them. However, you just shouldn't allow it. It's also ok to talk about your pain if she makes untruthful allegations to you. She's actually making a victim of you. You want to emphasize that you want to have a relationship with her, but you have to have boundaries based on the truth. It may not work, but if you don't set that boundary, it'll be hard to have a relationship with her that isn't based on vilifying you.
