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<blockquote data-quote="Echolette" data-source="post: 629425" data-attributes="member: 17269"><p>JKF, </p><p></p><p>I feel your pain over the birthday, and also the pained confusion over talking to your son living at the train station. I share both those issues. difficult child was in rehab for his 18th birthday...we celebrated with his twin, but not him. Honestly, I don't remember what happened on the next two birthdays...I know I didn't see or talk to him this year, but I did choose to post a baby picture of him and his twin on facebook (I do that every year.). I kind of feel like birthdays and holidays with difficult child are over...he was in jail on Christmas this year, and chose not to come to Thanksgiving, even though as a kid he totally adored all family get togethers and holidays. I guess...I just feel like there are more important issues at hand than the holidays, which are sort of a luxury of modern society that doesn't have a place for those of us in the trenches. But...I do feel the confusion and pain, you are not alone.</p><p></p><p>As far as chatting with your homeless son...that, my dear is a long long process to put in place, if you ever can. COM has posted a lot about that, as have I. Do you talk about the weather? The plans and activities of everyone else in the family, who have clearly found a better path? Smile and say "great?" and how DOES one respond to the good news of "I found a shelter to stay in tonight?". </p><p></p><p>Only those of us who have walked your path will ever, every understand it. </p><p></p><p>Good thing we are all here together! YOu are feeling your way. JT sounds better than I imagined, and has not behaved as I think we all feared...and I am so glad your sweet dad is recovering a little bit.</p><p></p><p>Thanks for the update. We like all of them, whether they have a focus point of a big crisis or not.</p><p></p><p>Fondly,</p><p></p><p>Echo</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Echolette, post: 629425, member: 17269"] JKF, I feel your pain over the birthday, and also the pained confusion over talking to your son living at the train station. I share both those issues. difficult child was in rehab for his 18th birthday...we celebrated with his twin, but not him. Honestly, I don't remember what happened on the next two birthdays...I know I didn't see or talk to him this year, but I did choose to post a baby picture of him and his twin on facebook (I do that every year.). I kind of feel like birthdays and holidays with difficult child are over...he was in jail on Christmas this year, and chose not to come to Thanksgiving, even though as a kid he totally adored all family get togethers and holidays. I guess...I just feel like there are more important issues at hand than the holidays, which are sort of a luxury of modern society that doesn't have a place for those of us in the trenches. But...I do feel the confusion and pain, you are not alone. As far as chatting with your homeless son...that, my dear is a long long process to put in place, if you ever can. COM has posted a lot about that, as have I. Do you talk about the weather? The plans and activities of everyone else in the family, who have clearly found a better path? Smile and say "great?" and how DOES one respond to the good news of "I found a shelter to stay in tonight?". Only those of us who have walked your path will ever, every understand it. Good thing we are all here together! YOu are feeling your way. JT sounds better than I imagined, and has not behaved as I think we all feared...and I am so glad your sweet dad is recovering a little bit. Thanks for the update. We like all of them, whether they have a focus point of a big crisis or not. Fondly, Echo [/QUOTE]
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