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Update on difficult child, he is now living with birth mom and family
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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 436263" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>Natalie - </p><p> </p><p>I have profound peace, thank you! I am very hopeful for your son and Nancy's daughter that they both find the things that put the puzzles of their lives together for them. Both have been given lives, second chances, luck that they don't fully appreciate because they're too clouded by the thinking about what they think they don't have rather than appreciating what they do have. It's a process, a journey and sadly both are going to have to start way back at the beginning and uncover things about themselves that aren't going to be easy to deal with or face. Maybe now that they're older they'll be able to do it without the crutches of drugs and booze, and let the anger go, replace it with understanding of themselves and the circumstances surrounding the W's of their births, (who, what, where, when, why, and HOW) Once a lot of those are answered? Things start to fall into place whether a BM is there or a boyfriend is there - it's not so much THEM -answering questions - it's THEMSELVES and once you start realizing "OH I did THAT because I......felt this way or that way and I did that because I was a child and thought this way or that way." Even at 18 or so years old - they start to recognize the patterns of behaviors that led them to do things that were not such good choices and decisions. This is where they are able to think for themselves and say "I don't and won't make that decision again because I've already MADE that mistake and LOOK where it got me - I felt this way about it or it led me to do THIS bad thing." That's when the pieces start to fit that it does NOT matter - WHO your family is......It only matters WHO.....YOU are. You start to recognize that in this world - It's not the people that gave birth to you necessarily that have your back ----it's the people that led you to GOOD choices - regardless of WHO they were - THEY loved you. Love =caring =good choices =raised me to be something more than I am genetically=successful= happy=peace and in the end? That's what it's all about because without peace in your life, in your heart, in your soul you can KNOW everything else there is - but the rest of your won't ever be settled and no one can fix that but YOU. Only YOU can make the pieces fit. </p><p> </p><p>This is why I preach till my tongue falls out - seek counseling and keep your kids in it....or change until you find the right counselor because I wish everyone that same peace.......and the only one that can get it for you? Is you. </p><p> </p><p>Hugs & Love </p><p>Star</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 436263, member: 4964"] Natalie - I have profound peace, thank you! I am very hopeful for your son and Nancy's daughter that they both find the things that put the puzzles of their lives together for them. Both have been given lives, second chances, luck that they don't fully appreciate because they're too clouded by the thinking about what they think they don't have rather than appreciating what they do have. It's a process, a journey and sadly both are going to have to start way back at the beginning and uncover things about themselves that aren't going to be easy to deal with or face. Maybe now that they're older they'll be able to do it without the crutches of drugs and booze, and let the anger go, replace it with understanding of themselves and the circumstances surrounding the W's of their births, (who, what, where, when, why, and HOW) Once a lot of those are answered? Things start to fall into place whether a BM is there or a boyfriend is there - it's not so much THEM -answering questions - it's THEMSELVES and once you start realizing "OH I did THAT because I......felt this way or that way and I did that because I was a child and thought this way or that way." Even at 18 or so years old - they start to recognize the patterns of behaviors that led them to do things that were not such good choices and decisions. This is where they are able to think for themselves and say "I don't and won't make that decision again because I've already MADE that mistake and LOOK where it got me - I felt this way about it or it led me to do THIS bad thing." That's when the pieces start to fit that it does NOT matter - WHO your family is......It only matters WHO.....YOU are. You start to recognize that in this world - It's not the people that gave birth to you necessarily that have your back ----it's the people that led you to GOOD choices - regardless of WHO they were - THEY loved you. Love =caring =good choices =raised me to be something more than I am genetically=successful= happy=peace and in the end? That's what it's all about because without peace in your life, in your heart, in your soul you can KNOW everything else there is - but the rest of your won't ever be settled and no one can fix that but YOU. Only YOU can make the pieces fit. This is why I preach till my tongue falls out - seek counseling and keep your kids in it....or change until you find the right counselor because I wish everyone that same peace.......and the only one that can get it for you? Is you. Hugs & Love Star [/QUOTE]
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Update on difficult child, he is now living with birth mom and family
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