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Update on difficult child who recently moved out. Could it be?
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 620390" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>Sabine, you are very thoughtful to put yourself out there to try to help. What you cannot possible know is the devastation we here on the PE board have for the most part already gone through by the time we land here with our adult kids. Some of our kids are older then you are now and we've been going through this hell for decades. </p><p></p><p>One of the most important things we look for here is empathy and compassion from others who've walked in our shoes...........often we are judged in society or no one around us truly understands the heartbreak we live with daily. We are terrified for our kids and we've gone through losses and grief other parents will never have a clue about. We are broken, exhausted, depleted and have no where to turn. And when we find other parents who feel as we do, it is a miracle which brings an enormous amount of comfort to us.</p><p></p><p>Not one of us here arrives at the thought to put our kids out on the street with only a shelter address easily.......... by the time that becomes a possibility, believe me, we have exhausted everything else and likely for years...........and also likely to our own detriment with our health and our finances in ruins. </p><p></p><p>Many of our kids despise us, manipulate us, lie to us, do damage to our homes and our lives, steal from us, are violent with us, force us to live as hostages in our own homes........ruin our relationships and put us through years and years, sometimes decades of a nightmare not one of us can easily escape from. </p><p></p><p>Although I understand how much you want to help, I hear that, I would caution you to tread lightly, here on the PE board many of us are very vulnerable, shaken, very, very tired and we've heard everyone's assessment of us for a long time.............everyone's ideas about what we should be doing or not doing...........what we need more then anything else is compassion, empathy, understanding and a very soft place to rest as the battles in real life continue to rage...........</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 620390, member: 13542"] Sabine, you are very thoughtful to put yourself out there to try to help. What you cannot possible know is the devastation we here on the PE board have for the most part already gone through by the time we land here with our adult kids. Some of our kids are older then you are now and we've been going through this hell for decades. One of the most important things we look for here is empathy and compassion from others who've walked in our shoes...........often we are judged in society or no one around us truly understands the heartbreak we live with daily. We are terrified for our kids and we've gone through losses and grief other parents will never have a clue about. We are broken, exhausted, depleted and have no where to turn. And when we find other parents who feel as we do, it is a miracle which brings an enormous amount of comfort to us. Not one of us here arrives at the thought to put our kids out on the street with only a shelter address easily.......... by the time that becomes a possibility, believe me, we have exhausted everything else and likely for years...........and also likely to our own detriment with our health and our finances in ruins. Many of our kids despise us, manipulate us, lie to us, do damage to our homes and our lives, steal from us, are violent with us, force us to live as hostages in our own homes........ruin our relationships and put us through years and years, sometimes decades of a nightmare not one of us can easily escape from. Although I understand how much you want to help, I hear that, I would caution you to tread lightly, here on the PE board many of us are very vulnerable, shaken, very, very tired and we've heard everyone's assessment of us for a long time.............everyone's ideas about what we should be doing or not doing...........what we need more then anything else is compassion, empathy, understanding and a very soft place to rest as the battles in real life continue to rage........... [/QUOTE]
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Update on difficult child who recently moved out. Could it be?
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