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Update On difficult child
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 330388" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>I went and read your other posts also. My heart goes out to you, your husband and esp your other kids. It is so frimpin' HARD to grow up with a sib like that. Have my own gfgbro, and gfgson, so I KNOW. Even I probably do not know half of what your family is going through.</p><p></p><p>Be SURE to make a WRITTEN SAFETY PLAN. It needs to include every step the entire family is to do when difficult child is out of control. I know he is not in the home right now. Do it anyway. You may very well be investigated by DCFS - it is not unheard of. We had to have the safety plan or they wanted to take our other 2 kids away!!! ALl because we learned difficult child was trying to kill our daughter and we placed him in a psychiatric hospital (extended, NOT acute care. I have NO faith in or respect for the acute care places. NONE. Heck, most people don't even know that the non-acute care places exist. Even the psychiatrists and tdocs!).</p><p></p><p>At the first meeting, when the SW talked to the therapists and nurses she described my son as a "budding hannibal lector". A month later, when she spoke ONLY to him she said all he really needed was 1:1 time with his parents, and our LOVE. It was total manipulation, and she was stupid enough to buy it. (SW lost her job over our case, eventually. Her reports were just too different to be true, and he was too dangerous. She also traumatized our daughter and son (daughter was in 2nd grade and son was just 3.). Everyone who spoke to her ended up filing complaints with her boss because she was just hateful. No other description.)</p><p></p><p>Jsut be prepared and sit the entire family down to do a safety plan. Post it by the phones (print it up and have it laminated at Kinko's or wherever then have every family member carry a copy of it with their phone) . It is ALL that saved us from having difficult child come home and CPS take our other kids! </p><p></p><p>You are doing ALL the right things. KEEP calling/visiting the state atty every time the defense atty calls you. Refuse completely to let the defense atty or your son speak to the other kids. Tell them to ONLY answer phone calls from people they know. I am SURE difficult child knows their numbers and will use them against the family. Remind the kids that they are NOT crazy, that the family really IS that much worse when he is around. </p><p></p><p>Vent here as often as needed. Do whatever helps you all keep whatever sanity you can still grasp. It is an insane process, in my opinion.</p><p></p><p>I still have a tough time realizing you are in Florida. Florida has the most draconian drug laws in the US. The state of FL actually put a disabled, wheelchair bound man in PRISON for 25 years for using the pain medications his doctor prescribed!!! His OWN prescription - NOT one he stole! The DEA threatened his doctor until the doctor said the man stole the rx pad. doctor ADMITTED this on the stand, the coercion. And STILL they will not pick up your son for drug charges? </p><p></p><p>If he is released at some point (age 18 if nothing else will get him released. They will NOT keep him in jail/custody after age 18. They will release him as "fixed" until he breaks enough laws to be picked up as an adult. But you will be able to change locks and have him arrested for B&E if he breaks in.) you will NEED to do all of this again, sadly. The system is just nuts, esp in FL.</p><p></p><p>Just KEEP calling the police.</p><p></p><p>I am glad that they picked him up for the assault. I hope you are not terribly injured by the door glass. You could have been killed, as I am SURE you know. </p><p></p><p>You might look into the Pain Relief Network (<a href="http://www.painreliefnetwork.org" target="_blank">www.painreliefnetwork.org</a>) and find out the case against the man who is still in prison (I think. IF he is out it is VERY recently. The courts ruled he should not have been incarcerated but that they had no jurisdiction to release him and he should beg the Gov for clemency. This was a HUGE legal deal, and the website is still very active as of early Dec...) The case law on this might be useful for the State Atty who may know it, but it won't hurt you to point out the difference between how difficult child is treated and how this man was. Ammo for the state atty to use, in my opinion.</p><p></p><p>Many hugs to the family.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 330388, member: 1233"] I went and read your other posts also. My heart goes out to you, your husband and esp your other kids. It is so frimpin' HARD to grow up with a sib like that. Have my own gfgbro, and gfgson, so I KNOW. Even I probably do not know half of what your family is going through. Be SURE to make a WRITTEN SAFETY PLAN. It needs to include every step the entire family is to do when difficult child is out of control. I know he is not in the home right now. Do it anyway. You may very well be investigated by DCFS - it is not unheard of. We had to have the safety plan or they wanted to take our other 2 kids away!!! ALl because we learned difficult child was trying to kill our daughter and we placed him in a psychiatric hospital (extended, NOT acute care. I have NO faith in or respect for the acute care places. NONE. Heck, most people don't even know that the non-acute care places exist. Even the psychiatrists and tdocs!). At the first meeting, when the SW talked to the therapists and nurses she described my son as a "budding hannibal lector". A month later, when she spoke ONLY to him she said all he really needed was 1:1 time with his parents, and our LOVE. It was total manipulation, and she was stupid enough to buy it. (SW lost her job over our case, eventually. Her reports were just too different to be true, and he was too dangerous. She also traumatized our daughter and son (daughter was in 2nd grade and son was just 3.). Everyone who spoke to her ended up filing complaints with her boss because she was just hateful. No other description.) Jsut be prepared and sit the entire family down to do a safety plan. Post it by the phones (print it up and have it laminated at Kinko's or wherever then have every family member carry a copy of it with their phone) . It is ALL that saved us from having difficult child come home and CPS take our other kids! You are doing ALL the right things. KEEP calling/visiting the state atty every time the defense atty calls you. Refuse completely to let the defense atty or your son speak to the other kids. Tell them to ONLY answer phone calls from people they know. I am SURE difficult child knows their numbers and will use them against the family. Remind the kids that they are NOT crazy, that the family really IS that much worse when he is around. Vent here as often as needed. Do whatever helps you all keep whatever sanity you can still grasp. It is an insane process, in my opinion. I still have a tough time realizing you are in Florida. Florida has the most draconian drug laws in the US. The state of FL actually put a disabled, wheelchair bound man in PRISON for 25 years for using the pain medications his doctor prescribed!!! His OWN prescription - NOT one he stole! The DEA threatened his doctor until the doctor said the man stole the rx pad. doctor ADMITTED this on the stand, the coercion. And STILL they will not pick up your son for drug charges? If he is released at some point (age 18 if nothing else will get him released. They will NOT keep him in jail/custody after age 18. They will release him as "fixed" until he breaks enough laws to be picked up as an adult. But you will be able to change locks and have him arrested for B&E if he breaks in.) you will NEED to do all of this again, sadly. The system is just nuts, esp in FL. Just KEEP calling the police. I am glad that they picked him up for the assault. I hope you are not terribly injured by the door glass. You could have been killed, as I am SURE you know. You might look into the Pain Relief Network ([url]www.painreliefnetwork.org[/url]) and find out the case against the man who is still in prison (I think. IF he is out it is VERY recently. The courts ruled he should not have been incarcerated but that they had no jurisdiction to release him and he should beg the Gov for clemency. This was a HUGE legal deal, and the website is still very active as of early Dec...) The case law on this might be useful for the State Atty who may know it, but it won't hurt you to point out the difference between how difficult child is treated and how this man was. Ammo for the state atty to use, in my opinion. Many hugs to the family. [/QUOTE]
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