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Update on Dude
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<blockquote data-quote="DDD" data-source="post: 106948" data-attributes="member: 35"><p>You know what? If your posts are even halfway accurate, lol, it</p><p>is no wonder you are confused, DF is confused and Dude is really</p><p>really confused. How to H can you make decisions (or react to decisions made) when there are no parameters??</p><p></p><p>I absolutely know that you have done every darn thing in your power to help your son. I absolutely know that as much as you love him you don't feel capable of leading him to traditionally</p><p>accepted adulthood. I absolutely accept and respect as your CD</p><p>family member that the whole blankin' thing is just TOO much!</p><p></p><p>On the other hand you love your son and are scared to death for his future and you have reached out and reached out and reached</p><p>out for good quality help and you have gotten dung. Dude has also gotten the floor sweepings. It is beyond tragic.</p><p></p><p>I realize that Dude is probably 13 going on 18. He is a mess but</p><p>he is like the energizer bunny...he just keeps trying and trying</p><p>to achieve a goalless (sp?) level of existence. I admire him for that, Star. He's not a rocket scientist and he knows it but</p><p>he keeps trying and trying to be normal and follow whatever darn</p><p>rules he understands.</p><p></p><p>What can you do? I don't know, my friend, but Dude can not be</p><p>left to face the system alone. They have already half eaten him</p><p>and he will be devoured. If you can NOT see, explore, speak to</p><p>families about the new placement then do NOT do it. I understand</p><p>your sanity feels like it is at stake but the "system" you are</p><p>dealing with is NOT healthy. It can NOT be trusted.</p><p></p><p>I am not crying as I post this but I am anguished. You know my</p><p>heart is in the right place and I know you want someone you trust</p><p>to tell you to let go & save yourself. I can't do that, my friend. There truly has to be ONE person in your community or</p><p>parrish or county or State who has intelligence, knowledge of special needs, experience and HEART. The people you are dealing</p><p>with are lacking all of the above.</p><p></p><p>Do not think for a New York minute that I don't understand where</p><p>you are. (I have not been in a dangerous union, I'll admit.) I</p><p>have spent years praying that someone...anyone...would release</p><p>me from this ongoing stressful & painful way to live. I have found some helpers. I have not been relieved of the burden. If</p><p>medications can help DO IT. If they are for you..fine. If they</p><p>are for Dude...fine. </p><p></p><p>Just don't succomb to the idea that "they" will help Dude. "They" may be less competent than Dude to decide what is</p><p>right and wrong.</p><p></p><p>Without a doubt you can trust that I am praying that this current</p><p>painful situation leads to some long range help. Hugs. DDD</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DDD, post: 106948, member: 35"] You know what? If your posts are even halfway accurate, lol, it is no wonder you are confused, DF is confused and Dude is really really confused. How to H can you make decisions (or react to decisions made) when there are no parameters?? I absolutely know that you have done every darn thing in your power to help your son. I absolutely know that as much as you love him you don't feel capable of leading him to traditionally accepted adulthood. I absolutely accept and respect as your CD family member that the whole blankin' thing is just TOO much! On the other hand you love your son and are scared to death for his future and you have reached out and reached out and reached out for good quality help and you have gotten dung. Dude has also gotten the floor sweepings. It is beyond tragic. I realize that Dude is probably 13 going on 18. He is a mess but he is like the energizer bunny...he just keeps trying and trying to achieve a goalless (sp?) level of existence. I admire him for that, Star. He's not a rocket scientist and he knows it but he keeps trying and trying to be normal and follow whatever darn rules he understands. What can you do? I don't know, my friend, but Dude can not be left to face the system alone. They have already half eaten him and he will be devoured. If you can NOT see, explore, speak to families about the new placement then do NOT do it. I understand your sanity feels like it is at stake but the "system" you are dealing with is NOT healthy. It can NOT be trusted. I am not crying as I post this but I am anguished. You know my heart is in the right place and I know you want someone you trust to tell you to let go & save yourself. I can't do that, my friend. There truly has to be ONE person in your community or parrish or county or State who has intelligence, knowledge of special needs, experience and HEART. The people you are dealing with are lacking all of the above. Do not think for a New York minute that I don't understand where you are. (I have not been in a dangerous union, I'll admit.) I have spent years praying that someone...anyone...would release me from this ongoing stressful & painful way to live. I have found some helpers. I have not been relieved of the burden. If medications can help DO IT. If they are for you..fine. If they are for Dude...fine. Just don't succomb to the idea that "they" will help Dude. "They" may be less competent than Dude to decide what is right and wrong. Without a doubt you can trust that I am praying that this current painful situation leads to some long range help. Hugs. DDD [/QUOTE]
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