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<blockquote data-quote="Mikey" data-source="post: 86173" data-attributes="member: 3579"><p><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">What do you see happening if you actually do force him out of the house?</div></div></p><p></p><p>At the time I said it, I truly intened to have him depart in January. But at this point, I think he's leaving the house regardless of what I do. Like I said before - I was manipulated into feeding him the raw anger and emotion he wanted so he could use that as an excuse to leave and completely go off the deep end.</p><p></p><p>In any case, no matter why or when he leaves, it'll be my fault. And if/when that happens, I doubt that my marriage will survive. If anything happens to McWeedy once he's wanderin' out in the world, it'll only reinforce wife's conviction that I was a jackass and forced him out into a situation where he got hurt (or worse).</p><p></p><p>Even if nothing happens, he'll drink the very dregs of worst part of society once he leaves. Knowing he's gone, knowing what he's doing, and knowing that he has very little <em>immediate</em> chance at success will eat away at my beloved wife. The truth of him bringing it on himself will be outweighed by her belief that I forced him into a life situation where he has no chance to succeed. I still lose.</p><p></p><p>Doesn't look very promising.</p><p></p><p>So I'll try to work the first three steps of the Nar-Anon program until I truly believe them: </p><p></p><p>1: We admitted we were powerless over the Addict -- that our lives have become unmanageable. </p><p></p><p>2: Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. </p><p></p><p>3: Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. </p><p></p><p>#1's a piece of cake for me now. #2 is a stretch, but I might get there eventually (and good medications are always helpful when it comes to sanity, too :smile: ). And if I can get #3, then I'll be okay, regardless of anything else that may occur. But in truth I dunno what'll happen. Three months is a long time in the nightmare land of difficult child parenting.</p><p></p><p>Mikey</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Mikey, post: 86173, member: 3579"] <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">What do you see happening if you actually do force him out of the house?</div></div> At the time I said it, I truly intened to have him depart in January. But at this point, I think he's leaving the house regardless of what I do. Like I said before - I was manipulated into feeding him the raw anger and emotion he wanted so he could use that as an excuse to leave and completely go off the deep end. In any case, no matter why or when he leaves, it'll be my fault. And if/when that happens, I doubt that my marriage will survive. If anything happens to McWeedy once he's wanderin' out in the world, it'll only reinforce wife's conviction that I was a jackass and forced him out into a situation where he got hurt (or worse). Even if nothing happens, he'll drink the very dregs of worst part of society once he leaves. Knowing he's gone, knowing what he's doing, and knowing that he has very little [i]immediate[/i] chance at success will eat away at my beloved wife. The truth of him bringing it on himself will be outweighed by her belief that I forced him into a life situation where he has no chance to succeed. I still lose. Doesn't look very promising. So I'll try to work the first three steps of the Nar-Anon program until I truly believe them: 1: We admitted we were powerless over the Addict -- that our lives have become unmanageable. 2: Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. 3: Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. #1's a piece of cake for me now. #2 is a stretch, but I might get there eventually (and good medications are always helpful when it comes to sanity, too [img]:smile:[/img] ). And if I can get #3, then I'll be okay, regardless of anything else that may occur. But in truth I dunno what'll happen. Three months is a long time in the nightmare land of difficult child parenting. Mikey [/QUOTE]
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