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<blockquote data-quote="Sunlight" data-source="post: 33290" data-attributes="member: 97"><p>ant has always had a public defender. they are sworn to do a good job. it seems even when I paid a private lawyer for ant...the outcome was just as bad.</p><p>kat, this will take time. your son needs to see the inside of the cell. that is what they do to people who say they will kill themselves, they put them like that to watch them. </p><p></p><p>your son may kill himself with his drug abuse. so now, he has been stopped. he has to be sober and sane for now. no choice. he will learn some lessons while in jail. </p><p></p><p>the food is terrible, the beds are uncomfortable, it is always noisy. it is jail. if it was too comfy people would not hate it. </p><p></p><p>his actions are sad because they affect you guys too. I sobbed so many times over ant's situation in jail for over two yrs. prior to that he was in and out a lot in three diff jails. </p><p></p><p>your son will mostly be bored. he may be sad and scared. he will call you collect and cry and beg. I had to remind myself that our kids have to see this consequence or they will never fear drugs.</p><p></p><p>you will be able to visit your son. you will not be able to send him anything. write to him. tell him you love him and that when he makes the right choices, you will be there for him with all the support in the world. tell him you cannot go down this road with him. let him feel it. he must emblazon this on his mind. </p><p></p><p>I pray he gets help, but I would not count on it. a lot of the men in jail have mental health issues and a majority have drug and alcohol issues. he will be held til a hearing. most likely a deal will be drawn up by the PD. charges are all most always reduced to misdemeanors when it is a first offense. even ant has no felonies even though he participated in cashing stolen forged checks, terrorized and harrassed people, stole things, bought alcohol for underage kids, and did a bunch of other stuff. </p><p></p><p>hang in there. Aw gee I wish I could hug away the hurt this causes. it is so horrid to know your child is sinking to the bottom. esp with a holiday ahead. </p><p></p><p>rest up and take some solace in the fact you know where he is and he is alive and being watched 24/7</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Sunlight, post: 33290, member: 97"] ant has always had a public defender. they are sworn to do a good job. it seems even when I paid a private lawyer for ant...the outcome was just as bad. kat, this will take time. your son needs to see the inside of the cell. that is what they do to people who say they will kill themselves, they put them like that to watch them. your son may kill himself with his drug abuse. so now, he has been stopped. he has to be sober and sane for now. no choice. he will learn some lessons while in jail. the food is terrible, the beds are uncomfortable, it is always noisy. it is jail. if it was too comfy people would not hate it. his actions are sad because they affect you guys too. I sobbed so many times over ant's situation in jail for over two yrs. prior to that he was in and out a lot in three diff jails. your son will mostly be bored. he may be sad and scared. he will call you collect and cry and beg. I had to remind myself that our kids have to see this consequence or they will never fear drugs. you will be able to visit your son. you will not be able to send him anything. write to him. tell him you love him and that when he makes the right choices, you will be there for him with all the support in the world. tell him you cannot go down this road with him. let him feel it. he must emblazon this on his mind. I pray he gets help, but I would not count on it. a lot of the men in jail have mental health issues and a majority have drug and alcohol issues. he will be held til a hearing. most likely a deal will be drawn up by the PD. charges are all most always reduced to misdemeanors when it is a first offense. even ant has no felonies even though he participated in cashing stolen forged checks, terrorized and harrassed people, stole things, bought alcohol for underage kids, and did a bunch of other stuff. hang in there. Aw gee I wish I could hug away the hurt this causes. it is so horrid to know your child is sinking to the bottom. esp with a holiday ahead. rest up and take some solace in the fact you know where he is and he is alive and being watched 24/7 [/QUOTE]
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