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updating on son
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<blockquote data-quote="rebelson" data-source="post: 691462" data-attributes="member: 19966"><p>*March 25th, son <em>admitted himself</em> in to detox.</p><p>*April 8th, 2wks in detox but staff determined he wasn't ready to go straight to sober house/IOP. Was driven to and admitted to a very nice, posh almost, residential inpatient facility in Deerfield Beach. </p><p>*May 11-13 I flew down to attend 3-day family session with son and 4 other peers, their parents. </p><p>*May 17th son was discharged from residential facility to a sober living house, where he's doing IOP. </p><p></p><p>Soon he will have 90 days sober. </p><p></p><p>By all accounts, he seems to be doing well. He has not complained one iota about anything there. I think he, no.....I <em>KNOW</em> he likes the structure and the accountability. </p><p></p><p>He did not want access to his car for the 1st week that he was out of residential. Two weekends ago, he got a ticket on I-95. I was pissed and actually yelled at, then hung up on him, which I never do. Then, I didn't contact him for several days. I am seeing that he does not like it when I am angry at him. Based on his immediate response and sweetness when I finally get over anger and contact him. I am & have been his one and pretty much only, constant in his life. </p><p></p><p>During these recent past almost 3 months, he has been described by different staff/therapists/MD's to me, as: '<em>very cerebral; up in his head too much; needing humility; self-absorbed; if he doesn't respect you, he won't talk, open up to you; analyzes every little thing to the nth degree; has primitive communication skills (adolescent-like); he is a very interesting person to talk to; if he's not interested in the topic of conversation..you lose him; he has eccentric thinking..' </em></p><p></p><p>Last week, he started a job. Yay! He is working for a landscape company with another peer in his sober living house. They do large jobs like shopping centers and apartment complexes. He really likes this job as he does not do well in jobs where 'social tact' is needed. Since he hasn't gotten a paycheck yet, I helped him to buy a cooler for lunches & water and bluetooth earbuds, which the landscapers are allowed to wear as they work. Maybe I shouldn't have helped, but I did. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/giggle.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":giggle:" title="giggle :giggle:" data-shortname=":giggle:" /> One thing he did, that bothered me, was he told his boss on Monday that he needed Wednesdays off. His boss said fine. When I asked him why he did that?, he said it's because it's SO hot (it is south FL, mid-90's) and that he needed one day off in the week. Grrrr. On the other hand, I am so happy that he is working!!!! I think this type job is perfect for him! No social interactions with the public=). </p><p></p><p>He has had a much nicer temperament since being sober. I am again seeing some signs emerge, of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and some vague social anxieties, which I want to start a thread about, soon. </p><p></p><p>I am getting the feeling that he is not making AA a real priority. This worries me. He is attending all IOP's and other mandatory house meetings. And has not broken any curfews as far as I know. He told me last week that his cravings are not that bad. They last maybe 15 minutes in a whole day. </p><p></p><p>Some days he calls or texts me, some not. I try not to initiate any communication. I do have my nervous, anxious moments, but I talk myself down from them. There is nothing I can do, it is his life. I am trying to enjoy this thing day....by.....day. </p><p></p><p>And y'all help! <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/tongue.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":tongue:" title="tongue :tongue:" data-shortname=":tongue:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="rebelson, post: 691462, member: 19966"] *March 25th, son [I]admitted himself[/I] in to detox. *April 8th, 2wks in detox but staff determined he wasn't ready to go straight to sober house/IOP. Was driven to and admitted to a very nice, posh almost, residential inpatient facility in Deerfield Beach. *May 11-13 I flew down to attend 3-day family session with son and 4 other peers, their parents. *May 17th son was discharged from residential facility to a sober living house, where he's doing IOP. Soon he will have 90 days sober. By all accounts, he seems to be doing well. He has not complained one iota about anything there. I think he, no.....I [I]KNOW[/I] he likes the structure and the accountability. He did not want access to his car for the 1st week that he was out of residential. Two weekends ago, he got a ticket on I-95. I was pissed and actually yelled at, then hung up on him, which I never do. Then, I didn't contact him for several days. I am seeing that he does not like it when I am angry at him. Based on his immediate response and sweetness when I finally get over anger and contact him. I am & have been his one and pretty much only, constant in his life. During these recent past almost 3 months, he has been described by different staff/therapists/MD's to me, as: '[I]very cerebral; up in his head too much; needing humility; self-absorbed; if he doesn't respect you, he won't talk, open up to you; analyzes every little thing to the nth degree; has primitive communication skills (adolescent-like); he is a very interesting person to talk to; if he's not interested in the topic of conversation..you lose him; he has eccentric thinking..' [/I] Last week, he started a job. Yay! He is working for a landscape company with another peer in his sober living house. They do large jobs like shopping centers and apartment complexes. He really likes this job as he does not do well in jobs where 'social tact' is needed. Since he hasn't gotten a paycheck yet, I helped him to buy a cooler for lunches & water and bluetooth earbuds, which the landscapers are allowed to wear as they work. Maybe I shouldn't have helped, but I did. :giggle: One thing he did, that bothered me, was he told his boss on Monday that he needed Wednesdays off. His boss said fine. When I asked him why he did that?, he said it's because it's SO hot (it is south FL, mid-90's) and that he needed one day off in the week. Grrrr. On the other hand, I am so happy that he is working!!!! I think this type job is perfect for him! No social interactions with the public=). He has had a much nicer temperament since being sober. I am again seeing some signs emerge, of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and some vague social anxieties, which I want to start a thread about, soon. I am getting the feeling that he is not making AA a real priority. This worries me. He is attending all IOP's and other mandatory house meetings. And has not broken any curfews as far as I know. He told me last week that his cravings are not that bad. They last maybe 15 minutes in a whole day. Some days he calls or texts me, some not. I try not to initiate any communication. I do have my nervous, anxious moments, but I talk myself down from them. There is nothing I can do, it is his life. I am trying to enjoy this thing day....by.....day. And y'all help! :tongue: [/QUOTE]
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