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Family of Origin
Walking down Memory Lane
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 669665" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>OK. I will figure it out. We will hear from you only sporadically this week, and then, for a week or so, not at all. We will miss you Cedar. Be safe. D H be safe. </p><p></p><p>It will be hard for D H to leave his mother. I just thought about that. Winter and Spring will make a difference. He must be in agony, Cedar. </p><p></p><p>I am thinking about our children. How it is for me to have my son call me to tell me he wishes he were not alive. That he feels no way out of his agony. He cannot envision a future for himself. I guess that is the pain to which you refer. </p><p></p><p>And then last night, I said to M: We cannot have SON Visit us when we go cross country because I cannot take responsibility for how he acts (he cannot tolerate being near people, in a supermarket line, for example). </p><p></p><p>And M answered: "He cannot come to visit cross country for you. You cannot bear it. Your health." </p><p> </p><p>And if I were to feel what that really means, there would be pain. But I cannot really feel what is unbearable. So I will not.</p><p></p><p>I do not know the answer, Cedar.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 669665, member: 18958"] OK. I will figure it out. We will hear from you only sporadically this week, and then, for a week or so, not at all. We will miss you Cedar. Be safe. D H be safe. It will be hard for D H to leave his mother. I just thought about that. Winter and Spring will make a difference. He must be in agony, Cedar. I am thinking about our children. How it is for me to have my son call me to tell me he wishes he were not alive. That he feels no way out of his agony. He cannot envision a future for himself. I guess that is the pain to which you refer. And then last night, I said to M: We cannot have SON Visit us when we go cross country because I cannot take responsibility for how he acts (he cannot tolerate being near people, in a supermarket line, for example). And M answered: "He cannot come to visit cross country for you. You cannot bear it. Your health." And if I were to feel what that really means, there would be pain. But I cannot really feel what is unbearable. So I will not. I do not know the answer, Cedar. [/QUOTE]
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