So we did a reading the other night at our Alanon group that I find really helpful and gave me clarity. It is out of the book "Courage to Change" by Al-anon family groups. I thought I would share it here.
"I thought if I stopped enabling the alcoholic in my life, the drinking would stop. When the drinking seemed to get worse instead of better, once again I thought I had done something wrong. I was still the tying to control alcoholism and its symptoms. Al-Anon helped me to learn that I am powerless. I cannot stop an alcoholic from drinking. If I choose to stop contributing to the problem, I do so because it seems to be the right thing to do, something that will help me feel better about myself.
When I change my behavior, the behavior of those around me may also change, but there is not guarantee that it will change to my liking. Today I am learning to make choices because they are good for me, not because of the effect they might have on others."
This was helpful to me as my son starts on a path that I am very unsure about.... However I have to let him go and figure it out and love him in the process.
TL
