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Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
We have talked about the balance of enabling vs helping
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 689971" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Al anon says you did not cause it, you can not cure it and you can't control it.</p><p></p><p>All we can do is wish them well and be there for extreme cheerleading if they do the right thing.</p><p></p><p>Helicopter moms, many of my and the next generation, wanted them to have the best and some of us (not all but some) were too involved in their activities, choice of partners, choice of activities, pushing our dreams on them. Pushing maybe causes rebellion and resentment?</p><p></p><p>I think our grown kids best chance of doing well is to let them decide what is best for them and to do it without our interference and to not take it personally if they fall short of what we want for them.</p><p></p><p>Every single parent here has given his/her child chances,experiences and education that can lead to thriving. I'd say the majority of grown kids who are given these advantages, DO thrive, but maybe 20% decide to walk to the beat of their own drums and we can't stop them.</p><p></p><p>Rebel, I hope this is your sons difficult days are behind him. If not, you are right...his behavior is not on your shoulders. You did MORE than your best and it's his turn now.</p><p></p><p>Hoping for good times to come.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 689971, member: 1550"] Al anon says you did not cause it, you can not cure it and you can't control it. All we can do is wish them well and be there for extreme cheerleading if they do the right thing. Helicopter moms, many of my and the next generation, wanted them to have the best and some of us (not all but some) were too involved in their activities, choice of partners, choice of activities, pushing our dreams on them. Pushing maybe causes rebellion and resentment? I think our grown kids best chance of doing well is to let them decide what is best for them and to do it without our interference and to not take it personally if they fall short of what we want for them. Every single parent here has given his/her child chances,experiences and education that can lead to thriving. I'd say the majority of grown kids who are given these advantages, DO thrive, but maybe 20% decide to walk to the beat of their own drums and we can't stop them. Rebel, I hope this is your sons difficult days are behind him. If not, you are right...his behavior is not on your shoulders. You did MORE than your best and it's his turn now. Hoping for good times to come. [/QUOTE]
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Substance Abuse
We have talked about the balance of enabling vs helping
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