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Weird screeching, noises....ugh!!!
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 101783" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Lynn, something we have found is to allow the stuff that really doesn't matter, and to try to control the stuff that is a big issue. By leaving the kid with some sense of personal control in some areas, as well as a safety valve of sorts, it's easier to control, say, noises in class or out in public.</p><p></p><p>A lot of these stims and habits are a coping mechanism. They soothe, help them stay calmer - it's simply something that the kid has found for himself. In the same way that any young child works out for himself what he likes and doesn't like, an autistic child will find that doing some things a certain way is much more enjoyable and makes him feel happier.</p><p></p><p>So we let our boys nest, as long as they either do it in their own space, or tidy it up afterwards. We tolerated the old cardboard box in the living room for a week or so but eventually old cardboard boxes "die of natural causes" and we were able to throw it away with no grief.</p><p></p><p>Knowing they will be allowed their stims and habits can actually reduce the NEED for them, since feeling safer reduces their anxiety a little, which reduces the need for the stimulant.</p><p></p><p>So yes, definitely tell the doctor, but make it clear that you're not necessarily asking for it to all go away. </p><p>As the child gets older and more socially aware, he will begin to have more control over his own stims and will 'adapt' and become more socially 'acceptable'.</p><p></p><p>If you try to suppress all this, it WIL break out in other ways and both you and the child will have less control.</p><p></p><p>However, if a stimulant really is unacceptable, it can be changed with patience and gaining cooperation of the child. But it will happen by replacing it with a more acceptable stimulant - and you really can't make choices in this. You just keep the pressure (gently) until something you can stand takes its place.</p><p></p><p>The world is made up of many people in infinite and glorious variety. Autistic people and their idiosyncrasies are part of the spectrum of humanity, just as they are. With our boys, our aim is to give them as much as they can handle in terms of learning to use their abilities to become independent, happy, functioning and productive members of society. They will always be a little bit different but it is those differences which are such an important part of who they are and what they are capable of.</p><p>We can't all be bank tellers and accountants. We need a few Steve Irwins and Bill Gates' in this world!</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 101783, member: 1991"] Lynn, something we have found is to allow the stuff that really doesn't matter, and to try to control the stuff that is a big issue. By leaving the kid with some sense of personal control in some areas, as well as a safety valve of sorts, it's easier to control, say, noises in class or out in public. A lot of these stims and habits are a coping mechanism. They soothe, help them stay calmer - it's simply something that the kid has found for himself. In the same way that any young child works out for himself what he likes and doesn't like, an autistic child will find that doing some things a certain way is much more enjoyable and makes him feel happier. So we let our boys nest, as long as they either do it in their own space, or tidy it up afterwards. We tolerated the old cardboard box in the living room for a week or so but eventually old cardboard boxes "die of natural causes" and we were able to throw it away with no grief. Knowing they will be allowed their stims and habits can actually reduce the NEED for them, since feeling safer reduces their anxiety a little, which reduces the need for the stimulant. So yes, definitely tell the doctor, but make it clear that you're not necessarily asking for it to all go away. As the child gets older and more socially aware, he will begin to have more control over his own stims and will 'adapt' and become more socially 'acceptable'. If you try to suppress all this, it WIL break out in other ways and both you and the child will have less control. However, if a stimulant really is unacceptable, it can be changed with patience and gaining cooperation of the child. But it will happen by replacing it with a more acceptable stimulant - and you really can't make choices in this. You just keep the pressure (gently) until something you can stand takes its place. The world is made up of many people in infinite and glorious variety. Autistic people and their idiosyncrasies are part of the spectrum of humanity, just as they are. With our boys, our aim is to give them as much as they can handle in terms of learning to use their abilities to become independent, happy, functioning and productive members of society. They will always be a little bit different but it is those differences which are such an important part of who they are and what they are capable of. We can't all be bank tellers and accountants. We need a few Steve Irwins and Bill Gates' in this world! Marg [/QUOTE]
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