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Parent Emeritus
Well, here I am, almost at breaking point - son aged 30
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<blockquote data-quote="hannahb" data-source="post: 712466" data-attributes="member: 21834"><p>Hello Belle, so sorry to read about your mother. I can imagine how painful it is also to see your son behave so destructively. I have been through terrible times with my daughter, now 35, (only child) for the last 22 years. Including twice expelled from two different schools, thrown out of two universities, smashing up my house a number of times, attacking me physically many times. Things have got better in the last couple of years, but again I'm feeling sad and angry abut her rudeness and disrespect yesterday. Reading this site is helping me. She is still reliant on me financially but I think she is at last trying to make some money. We will see. I have no money left which might be after all a good thing if it means I can 't give it to her any longer. I'm trying to disengage with love. so hard to disengage and I don't want to disengage with anger. I am trying to keep to the mantra - don't offer anything, don't give advice, don't ask questions - in fact don't speak! Her rudeness yesterday arose because we were both invited out for lunch to thank us for support we give a charity. I was apparently 'mad' and 'embarrassing' and 'didn't do enough research on the charity beforehand'. Of course I am the actual philanthrope not my daughter and today I'm thinking actually the lunch was to thank me not her! What a weird world ! Take care. sue</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="hannahb, post: 712466, member: 21834"] Hello Belle, so sorry to read about your mother. I can imagine how painful it is also to see your son behave so destructively. I have been through terrible times with my daughter, now 35, (only child) for the last 22 years. Including twice expelled from two different schools, thrown out of two universities, smashing up my house a number of times, attacking me physically many times. Things have got better in the last couple of years, but again I'm feeling sad and angry abut her rudeness and disrespect yesterday. Reading this site is helping me. She is still reliant on me financially but I think she is at last trying to make some money. We will see. I have no money left which might be after all a good thing if it means I can 't give it to her any longer. I'm trying to disengage with love. so hard to disengage and I don't want to disengage with anger. I am trying to keep to the mantra - don't offer anything, don't give advice, don't ask questions - in fact don't speak! Her rudeness yesterday arose because we were both invited out for lunch to thank us for support we give a charity. I was apparently 'mad' and 'embarrassing' and 'didn't do enough research on the charity beforehand'. Of course I am the actual philanthrope not my daughter and today I'm thinking actually the lunch was to thank me not her! What a weird world ! Take care. sue [/QUOTE]
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Well, here I am, almost at breaking point - son aged 30
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