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Well who packed me and moved me to Hooverville?
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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 306574" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>Toto, </p><p> </p><p>I would not say this if I didn't feel like the dope fairy myself. And (exhales after much thought before saying this) I want you to take this for what it is worth and understand that this is my son I'm talking about and not your daughter so it is two completely different people, with two completely different types of problems. That being said here goes. </p><p> </p><p>In the world I know now that there are a lot of very disturbed children because I am the former wife of a very disturbed man. I am also the Mother of a child who was labled at 4 years old as so disturbed that there was little hope. I mean literally who lables a kid that disturbed at four? So we started him on medicine after medicine. Guinea pig treatment after guinea pig treatment. Up, down, up, down went his moods, his behaviors and everything else in our whole world. Everything. </p><p> </p><p>Sixty seven medications later if you ask me if I had it to do all over again with medications would I allow the doctors to prescribe again? Knowing that 13 years of medications did nothing? No. No I would not. We tried SSRI's of varying classes. We tried anti-depressants. We tried mood-elevators. We tried stimulants. We tried downers, uppers, inbetweeners. Combinations of almost everything known and each time there was something new out? The doctors would suggest it as the only thing left to try. Desperate - I'd say, beg, cry, plead - please let it be the one that helps him. It never was. Never. </p><p> </p><p>At sixteen years old Dude finally told everyone he wasn't taking any more pills. In Department of Juvenile Justice they told him if he didn't take his prescribed medications? He would get more jail time and solitary time. He took the medications and ended up trying to commit suicide - again. So what was the use? Now years later I can actually say that for as many years as I was pro-whatever works for the moment, my house isn't so sure after all we've gone through that it ever did. Matter of fact - when they suggested Lithium for Dude it was the first time we said No and backed away from medications period. </p><p> </p><p>I understand your frustration about K's missing out on the Tye-Dye party vs. frickin fairies in the T-docs office. She's your baby - and you want her to have as many norms as she can and when she misses them? It's hurtful. I know - Dude spent more time in hospitals than he did in school OR at home - so believe me I know. I have 3 actual school pictures of him - the rest are of him in Residential Treatment Center (RTC)'s. Makes me just cringe when I see those 12 years of school photo frames......but - at 19 he's still trying to get a GED and that is noble. He still get's up every day despite whatever gets thrown at him and goes on and to me that builds character. So it's not all for not with our kids. They'll get a whole other life lesson that a lot of other "normal" kids will never get. Maybe if you think like this - Our kids get a non-elective class that is so special you actually have to be one of our kids to get the lessons - that not just everyone gets in - and at some point? The lessons they learn DO help them in life where other kids in mainstream wouldn't "get" what our kids "get" because....they didn't GET it.....get it? - Makes our kids just a cut above in that respect. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" /></p><p>It's an exclusive club. Really. Secret society of sorts. lol. </p><p> </p><p>I still mourn some of the things that I feel Dude never got - that's pretty normal. (Shrug) I still morn a lot of the things I never got - (okay not counting the PTA thing - but I did get to meet great ladies who would go absolutely out of their way to stick 3 stone donkeys in the sand, and one Mr. Meany with a rope out and take pictures and write an awesome story - and I bet you no other person in the regular world has ever gotten something so cool...'cause I know they haven't. And...I can tell you for sure - no one else has 2 princesses living in Arazionia..and a story made just for them...huh? Yeah...right? So there are perks to being no so normal. And you can probably get K a tye-dye shirt kit - and make her one at home - (not the same I know) but.....what if her Auntie Star sent her - HER Grateful Dead dancing bear Tye Die Shirt? Huh? - NO? <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/faint.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":faint:" title="faint :faint:" data-shortname=":faint:" />Okay then....(groan) lol. Just sayin. ahem. Actually probably better cause I wouldn't have anything for N...lol. Oh wait - I do have that Bdazzled Rolling Stone tongue thing - huh?? No too huh? Okay - I tried. </p><p> </p><p>Listen - all I'm saying is that right now - there are a lot of things that are going to hurt you - and rightfully so. Belive it or not when you write about them - they hurt a lot of us for you and K too. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite3" alt=":(" title="Frown :(" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":(" /> - But we understand. Doesn't make it better - but wanted you to know that. </p><p> </p><p>Just hug my angel for me. I'm sorry she's having such a rough time - and you too. Maybe the answer isn't more medicines - maybe it's less to no medicines and some type of EMDR therapy or total body massage? Have you considered allergy testing? have I asked that before? Ugh...Just a loving auntie thinking out loud. How about an MRI or PET scan? There just has to be something with her that we're all missing...AND what about? A THERAPY DOG?? I mean it....what about a pet that would be with her like a trained lab that could sense when she's about to have a meltdown and could alert a classroom aid and could get her to a saferoom? Dude had WAY less anxiety when he had a dog around...it seems with our children if they have a pet that can sense their anxiety attacks - it helps calm them - and they DO have therapy dogs available and trained for such things. How about that? Would that help her? </p><p> </p><p>Hugs & Love </p><p>Star</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 306574, member: 4964"] Toto, I would not say this if I didn't feel like the dope fairy myself. And (exhales after much thought before saying this) I want you to take this for what it is worth and understand that this is my son I'm talking about and not your daughter so it is two completely different people, with two completely different types of problems. That being said here goes. In the world I know now that there are a lot of very disturbed children because I am the former wife of a very disturbed man. I am also the Mother of a child who was labled at 4 years old as so disturbed that there was little hope. I mean literally who lables a kid that disturbed at four? So we started him on medicine after medicine. Guinea pig treatment after guinea pig treatment. Up, down, up, down went his moods, his behaviors and everything else in our whole world. Everything. Sixty seven medications later if you ask me if I had it to do all over again with medications would I allow the doctors to prescribe again? Knowing that 13 years of medications did nothing? No. No I would not. We tried SSRI's of varying classes. We tried anti-depressants. We tried mood-elevators. We tried stimulants. We tried downers, uppers, inbetweeners. Combinations of almost everything known and each time there was something new out? The doctors would suggest it as the only thing left to try. Desperate - I'd say, beg, cry, plead - please let it be the one that helps him. It never was. Never. At sixteen years old Dude finally told everyone he wasn't taking any more pills. In Department of Juvenile Justice they told him if he didn't take his prescribed medications? He would get more jail time and solitary time. He took the medications and ended up trying to commit suicide - again. So what was the use? Now years later I can actually say that for as many years as I was pro-whatever works for the moment, my house isn't so sure after all we've gone through that it ever did. Matter of fact - when they suggested Lithium for Dude it was the first time we said No and backed away from medications period. I understand your frustration about K's missing out on the Tye-Dye party vs. frickin fairies in the T-docs office. She's your baby - and you want her to have as many norms as she can and when she misses them? It's hurtful. I know - Dude spent more time in hospitals than he did in school OR at home - so believe me I know. I have 3 actual school pictures of him - the rest are of him in Residential Treatment Center (RTC)'s. Makes me just cringe when I see those 12 years of school photo frames......but - at 19 he's still trying to get a GED and that is noble. He still get's up every day despite whatever gets thrown at him and goes on and to me that builds character. So it's not all for not with our kids. They'll get a whole other life lesson that a lot of other "normal" kids will never get. Maybe if you think like this - Our kids get a non-elective class that is so special you actually have to be one of our kids to get the lessons - that not just everyone gets in - and at some point? The lessons they learn DO help them in life where other kids in mainstream wouldn't "get" what our kids "get" because....they didn't GET it.....get it? - Makes our kids just a cut above in that respect. :winking: It's an exclusive club. Really. Secret society of sorts. lol. I still mourn some of the things that I feel Dude never got - that's pretty normal. (Shrug) I still morn a lot of the things I never got - (okay not counting the PTA thing - but I did get to meet great ladies who would go absolutely out of their way to stick 3 stone donkeys in the sand, and one Mr. Meany with a rope out and take pictures and write an awesome story - and I bet you no other person in the regular world has ever gotten something so cool...'cause I know they haven't. And...I can tell you for sure - no one else has 2 princesses living in Arazionia..and a story made just for them...huh? Yeah...right? So there are perks to being no so normal. And you can probably get K a tye-dye shirt kit - and make her one at home - (not the same I know) but.....what if her Auntie Star sent her - HER Grateful Dead dancing bear Tye Die Shirt? Huh? - NO? :knockedout:Okay then....(groan) lol. Just sayin. ahem. Actually probably better cause I wouldn't have anything for N...lol. Oh wait - I do have that Bdazzled Rolling Stone tongue thing - huh?? No too huh? Okay - I tried. Listen - all I'm saying is that right now - there are a lot of things that are going to hurt you - and rightfully so. Belive it or not when you write about them - they hurt a lot of us for you and K too. :frowny: - But we understand. Doesn't make it better - but wanted you to know that. Just hug my angel for me. I'm sorry she's having such a rough time - and you too. Maybe the answer isn't more medicines - maybe it's less to no medicines and some type of EMDR therapy or total body massage? Have you considered allergy testing? have I asked that before? Ugh...Just a loving auntie thinking out loud. How about an MRI or PET scan? There just has to be something with her that we're all missing...AND what about? A THERAPY DOG?? I mean it....what about a pet that would be with her like a trained lab that could sense when she's about to have a meltdown and could alert a classroom aid and could get her to a saferoom? Dude had WAY less anxiety when he had a dog around...it seems with our children if they have a pet that can sense their anxiety attacks - it helps calm them - and they DO have therapy dogs available and trained for such things. How about that? Would that help her? Hugs & Love Star [/QUOTE]
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