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<blockquote data-quote="GoingNorth" data-source="post: 652257" data-attributes="member: 1963"><p>I don't know that reading the diary of a someone who went through the Holocaust would be that helpful to me. The last of my relatives who survived the camps died last month at the age of 101.</p><p></p><p>I grew up hearing the stories from those who lived through the Sho'ah. I toured the camps in Germany and the former Eastern Bloc countries. Most of my family died in the Holocaust.</p><p></p><p>Part of the reason I am having trouble dealing with my anger is that it's such an alien and non-productive emotion for me. There is no logic to anger. It's corrosive and no healing comes of it unless it is channelled, forged, and by that forging, turned into something useful.</p><p></p><p>Where I need help is in turning the bitter acid of anger into something productive.</p><p></p><p>What angers me the most is the sheer self-centered-ness of my sister's actions: the number of people she's harming by going off her medications and starting to drink again. She's never truly quit drinking or drugging.</p><p></p><p>Oh, she goes "dry" for a while here and there, but she's still an addict with an addicts way of thinking, and now that she's gone off her medications, we get to add the damned bipolar to the rest of the mess. And, I have little patience for that as well.</p><p></p><p>She was stable on her medications for several years. I went through her bipolar with her when she was in her 20s and 30s, before I knew I was bipolar as well.</p><p></p><p>husband and I were constantly rescuing her from "situations" that her mania got her into. I have no intentions of rescuing her again. Her children, my niece and nephew, are adults with jobs and lives of their own. One has broken away from the enmeshment and is married and lives in Taiwan. The other has a good job and has just ended a long term relationship. She is still enmeshed with my sister, but seems to be pulling free finally.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="GoingNorth, post: 652257, member: 1963"] I don't know that reading the diary of a someone who went through the Holocaust would be that helpful to me. The last of my relatives who survived the camps died last month at the age of 101. I grew up hearing the stories from those who lived through the Sho'ah. I toured the camps in Germany and the former Eastern Bloc countries. Most of my family died in the Holocaust. Part of the reason I am having trouble dealing with my anger is that it's such an alien and non-productive emotion for me. There is no logic to anger. It's corrosive and no healing comes of it unless it is channelled, forged, and by that forging, turned into something useful. Where I need help is in turning the bitter acid of anger into something productive. What angers me the most is the sheer self-centered-ness of my sister's actions: the number of people she's harming by going off her medications and starting to drink again. She's never truly quit drinking or drugging. Oh, she goes "dry" for a while here and there, but she's still an addict with an addicts way of thinking, and now that she's gone off her medications, we get to add the damned bipolar to the rest of the mess. And, I have little patience for that as well. She was stable on her medications for several years. I went through her bipolar with her when she was in her 20s and 30s, before I knew I was bipolar as well. husband and I were constantly rescuing her from "situations" that her mania got her into. I have no intentions of rescuing her again. Her children, my niece and nephew, are adults with jobs and lives of their own. One has broken away from the enmeshment and is married and lives in Taiwan. The other has a good job and has just ended a long term relationship. She is still enmeshed with my sister, but seems to be pulling free finally. [/QUOTE]
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