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General Parenting
What About Mom's Feelings...?
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<blockquote data-quote="mstang67chic" data-source="post: 232794" data-attributes="member: 2459"><p>I have been relatively lucky in that I haven't really had professionals question anything. Probably though, because since we adopted difficult child out of foster care, he came with a diagnosis already. Family and friends however.....that was a different story. I got a lot of comments from my parents....too strict, not strict enough, boys will be boys, I need to ease up, I need to buckle down, etc. It's been long enough now though that even though they still may not understand, they now know it's not me. But, probably the best thing any therapist or doctor has ever said to me was when a new to us counselor (after only a couple of sessions) said to me that it must be hard living the way we have to when I told him how our household operates. (locking things up, not buying new things, and just dealing with some of difficult child's "finer" moments). Honestly, when he said that, I almost cried. This was our 7th counselor in 8 years at that point and he was the FIRST person to really acknowledge that. I made a point of thanking him and telling him how much that meant to me as a parent to have our (for lack of a better word) sacrifices acknowledged. </p><p></p><p>I know there have been several threads along this line over the years. Someone with more board savvy than I have could give you some links. Some of them had some really good come back comments for situations like this.</p><p></p><p>Sending hugs. WE know it's not you!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="mstang67chic, post: 232794, member: 2459"] I have been relatively lucky in that I haven't really had professionals question anything. Probably though, because since we adopted difficult child out of foster care, he came with a diagnosis already. Family and friends however.....that was a different story. I got a lot of comments from my parents....too strict, not strict enough, boys will be boys, I need to ease up, I need to buckle down, etc. It's been long enough now though that even though they still may not understand, they now know it's not me. But, probably the best thing any therapist or doctor has ever said to me was when a new to us counselor (after only a couple of sessions) said to me that it must be hard living the way we have to when I told him how our household operates. (locking things up, not buying new things, and just dealing with some of difficult child's "finer" moments). Honestly, when he said that, I almost cried. This was our 7th counselor in 8 years at that point and he was the FIRST person to really acknowledge that. I made a point of thanking him and telling him how much that meant to me as a parent to have our (for lack of a better word) sacrifices acknowledged. I know there have been several threads along this line over the years. Someone with more board savvy than I have could give you some links. Some of them had some really good come back comments for situations like this. Sending hugs. WE know it's not you! [/QUOTE]
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