I wanted to give you an update. He sent another text saying he was going to "just lie to them so I can enlist and deal with the consequences if I get caught. I'm tired of constantly worrying about my job and loneliness."
I really REALLY wanted to give him some advice or try to get accurate information but I didn't. (!!!)
Using your suggestions, I texted him back "I'm sorry things are so hard for you right now. You've done great so far, and I have all faith you will continue. You know what is best for you. Best wishes with whatever you decide."
All true statements, no fixing, just faith.
He responded, "Well, thank you. I ended up getting a nice tip at work which is pretty cool. Thank you, I will try to get cleared for service as soon as I can. Working tomorrow so I will make rent. Love you."
So he was catastrophizing, and he worked through it without any help from you-know-who.
Today he worked through a challenge on his own, and I let him.
