Why do you let him live with you? in my opinion at his age he knows you are upset with his baby tantrums and threats to ruin you and no explanation is necessary to make him leave. I don't know if there are tenancy laws where you live. Get him out ASAP. He is a real threat to you and you won't have peace until he is gone. In the U.S. you can take out a restraining order on a threatening person. I don't know the laws where you live. If you can protect yourself legally, do it. If not buy a security system and protect yourself the best you can.
Make him work with the government for benefits and housing. I wouldn't home him or give him another dime. He is off the rails. Let him learn the hard way. Most young adults like him don't learn at all when we are nice to them or giving to them and they must learn one way or another. You are not his mat to stomp on. Don't listen to his nonsense. Don't be his doormat.
Our responsibility ends at 18 in the U.S. if our child is doing well we usually are happy to extend our help beyond that. But no abiser deserves to live under our roof.
Sister did the right thing.
This is domestic abuse by a child. Far more common than most know. Take your power back. Maybe talk to a counselor at a domestic abuse shelter.
I ask again...why is he still with you? He doesn't have to live with you. He is taking advantage of you. I k ow you love him he is your son, but he needs to learn to love others and be a decent adult. That will never happen under your roof.
Love and light!
