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What does detachment look like to you?
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<blockquote data-quote="Echolette" data-source="post: 617974" data-attributes="member: 17269"><p>Detachment looks like I have no relationship with my daughter. When I made the connection that there was a huge amount of energy going towards her and none coming back, that changed a lot for me..........in pulling back all the energy I was exerting for my daughter, I had quite a bit more for my own life. So, one clear component is I have more time, more energy, more money, more head space that is not cluttered with thoughts about her and her needs. Since I have had a history of caring for the members of my family and my difficult child was the last in my enabling career, this has had a large impact on my life.</p><p></p><p>Dstc is right, it is about letting go. Letting go of not just the sense of parental responsibility, but a friendship with my daughter, any kind of connection at all, my hopes for her, letting go of my fear about what will happen to her, how she will survive now and when I am gone...........letting go of my own self blame and self judgment that I did this or could have stopped it..........i<em>t's a whole lot of letting go.</em></p><p><em>Where I am now is leaning into acceptance, the deep down knowledge that I am completely powerless and this <em>is what it is</em>, there is nothing else I can do. I still have hope that she will pull it together, but none of my life depends on that.</em></p><p><em></em></p><p><em>Read more: <a href="http://www.conductdisorders.com/community/threads/what-does-detachment-look-like-to-you.55620/#ixzz2r4CO5std" target="_blank">http://www.conductdisorders.com/community/threads/what-does-detachment-look-like-to-you.55620/#ixzz2r4CO5std</a></em></p><p><em></em></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Echolette, post: 617974, member: 17269"] Detachment looks like I have no relationship with my daughter. When I made the connection that there was a huge amount of energy going towards her and none coming back, that changed a lot for me..........in pulling back all the energy I was exerting for my daughter, I had quite a bit more for my own life. So, one clear component is I have more time, more energy, more money, more head space that is not cluttered with thoughts about her and her needs. Since I have had a history of caring for the members of my family and my difficult child was the last in my enabling career, this has had a large impact on my life. Dstc is right, it is about letting go. Letting go of not just the sense of parental responsibility, but a friendship with my daughter, any kind of connection at all, my hopes for her, letting go of my fear about what will happen to her, how she will survive now and when I am gone...........letting go of my own self blame and self judgment that I did this or could have stopped it..........i[I]t's a whole lot of letting go. Where I am now is leaning into acceptance, the deep down knowledge that I am completely powerless and this [I]is what it is[/I], there is nothing else I can do. I still have hope that she will pull it together, but none of my life depends on that. Read more: [url]http://www.conductdisorders.com/community/threads/what-does-detachment-look-like-to-you.55620/#ixzz2r4CO5std[/url] [/I] [/QUOTE]
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What does detachment look like to you?
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