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What have i done so wrong to make my adult daughter dislike me so much?
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 603864" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>Elllie, the main component of enabling is that often if not most of the time, the enabler has no real self, the self is all about others, the focus is external, there is a lack of a solid self in which to make healthy choices. This usually stems from childhood issues and we just perpetuate it until we reach the point you are at, depleted, feeling crazy, not knowing what is right or wrong, filled with fear and chaos. If you can't find a professional to help you, do some research into 12 step groups in your area, Codependents anonymous can be very helpful if you find the right fit. You are in another country so I am not sure what is available. Here in some cases, there are services offered through our medical system for Codependent recovery so you may want to look into that. Try reading a book called <u>Codependent no more</u> by Melody Beattie. You can pull yourself out of this quagmire you're in, take little steps each day to do something for YOU. Take the focus off of your daughter and put it on YOU. Look for some kind of support out there and keep posting here. With all you have on your plate and your isolation, you also sound depressed. is it possible for you to change Doctors to find someone with more compassion for your plight? Don't accept what you've been offered, search out others more willing to help you. Hang in there, you can make these changes............start today, go get that book. Sending you hugs............</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 603864, member: 13542"] Elllie, the main component of enabling is that often if not most of the time, the enabler has no real self, the self is all about others, the focus is external, there is a lack of a solid self in which to make healthy choices. This usually stems from childhood issues and we just perpetuate it until we reach the point you are at, depleted, feeling crazy, not knowing what is right or wrong, filled with fear and chaos. If you can't find a professional to help you, do some research into 12 step groups in your area, Codependents anonymous can be very helpful if you find the right fit. You are in another country so I am not sure what is available. Here in some cases, there are services offered through our medical system for Codependent recovery so you may want to look into that. Try reading a book called [U]Codependent no more[/U] by Melody Beattie. You can pull yourself out of this quagmire you're in, take little steps each day to do something for YOU. Take the focus off of your daughter and put it on YOU. Look for some kind of support out there and keep posting here. With all you have on your plate and your isolation, you also sound depressed. is it possible for you to change Doctors to find someone with more compassion for your plight? Don't accept what you've been offered, search out others more willing to help you. Hang in there, you can make these changes............start today, go get that book. Sending you hugs............ [/QUOTE]
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What have i done so wrong to make my adult daughter dislike me so much?
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