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Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
What if "IT" never gets better? Or, it gets worse?
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<blockquote data-quote="DammitJanet" data-source="post: 565198" data-attributes="member: 1514"><p>Okay, now you have given me more to work with. You are floating with a petulant toddler in a young adults body. </p><p></p><p>The boy is 20. While not quite where you wanted him to be he has made his own bed at this point. As I did. I may not have been quite cut out to be what your son was cut out to be but I had the SAT's to get into any IVY league school and my father would have paid for it willingly. I threw it away. Yeah, bonehead move. You can slap me now if you like. Sound like anyone you know? </p><p></p><p>Anyway, at this point I think you should tell dear son that you love him dearly but he is a grown up now and grown ups live on their own and take care of their own business. You are more than happy to see him on holidays, have him over for dinner on weekends, talk on the phone, do all the things parents and grown kids do but seeing as how he has chosen to be an independent adult...well have at it son! Go forth and be happy! We shall watch from the sidelines and cheer you on. We have all the faith in you that you can make your life successful. </p><p></p><p>Dont say anything negative to him. Just push the baby bird out of the nest. </p><p></p><p>This way you arent taking on the whole issue of what he is doing that you dont want to take on. You are putting everything squarely where it needs to be which is on his shoulders. Eventually he will figure out that he has to either pay rent, electricity, eat or smoke pot. Let him learn. If he gets in trouble, use the old standards of telling him you are sure he will figure it out. He is a smart boy.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DammitJanet, post: 565198, member: 1514"] Okay, now you have given me more to work with. You are floating with a petulant toddler in a young adults body. The boy is 20. While not quite where you wanted him to be he has made his own bed at this point. As I did. I may not have been quite cut out to be what your son was cut out to be but I had the SAT's to get into any IVY league school and my father would have paid for it willingly. I threw it away. Yeah, bonehead move. You can slap me now if you like. Sound like anyone you know? Anyway, at this point I think you should tell dear son that you love him dearly but he is a grown up now and grown ups live on their own and take care of their own business. You are more than happy to see him on holidays, have him over for dinner on weekends, talk on the phone, do all the things parents and grown kids do but seeing as how he has chosen to be an independent adult...well have at it son! Go forth and be happy! We shall watch from the sidelines and cheer you on. We have all the faith in you that you can make your life successful. Dont say anything negative to him. Just push the baby bird out of the nest. This way you arent taking on the whole issue of what he is doing that you dont want to take on. You are putting everything squarely where it needs to be which is on his shoulders. Eventually he will figure out that he has to either pay rent, electricity, eat or smoke pot. Let him learn. If he gets in trouble, use the old standards of telling him you are sure he will figure it out. He is a smart boy. [/QUOTE]
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What if "IT" never gets better? Or, it gets worse?
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