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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 745018" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Triedntrue, this is excellent. But it has to also apply to teens and young adults or it wont necessarily carry over. If you feel its the right thing, buy your sixteen year old in my opinion an old car but insist he have to work to pay at least half the insurance and all the gas. If he doesn't, let it sit there or eventually sell it. If he gets a speeding ticket it sits until he saves up money to pay it. Etc. Leading to all adult transitional moments.</p><p></p><p>I believe that this generation of parents demands very little respect and gives way too much to adults. We love them so much that we will do anything for them. </p><p></p><p>But If we didnt allow them to,say, hit us as toddlers, why would any parent allow this by an adult child and not press charges? Because the stakes are higher? What does it teach them to allow them to get away with stealing, lying, drugging in our home, assaulting us?</p><p></p><p>To me this is a big societal problem. A new one. Parents loving so much that we wont hold our beloved adult kids accountable and buy them what they should buy themselves.</p><p></p><p>The down side is, we have very low expectations of adult children. Then we wonder why they ask for more and dont behave like adults. We dont ask for the minimal, like respect. We are too afraid of seeing them uncomfortable than forcing them to grow up or face the consequences.</p><p></p><p> Or maybe we are afraid they wont love us anymore if we dont do what they demand.</p><p></p><p>Over and over again I read the same stories. Loving parents wont allow a 30 year old to learn to grow up. Or not. They treat us the way we allow.</p><p></p><p>I think not allowing any abuse from anyone is the best solution both for the abused and the abuser. It is hard to get tough on someone you love. I do think it is worth it. </p><p></p><p>Love and light!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 745018, member: 1550"] Triedntrue, this is excellent. But it has to also apply to teens and young adults or it wont necessarily carry over. If you feel its the right thing, buy your sixteen year old in my opinion an old car but insist he have to work to pay at least half the insurance and all the gas. If he doesn't, let it sit there or eventually sell it. If he gets a speeding ticket it sits until he saves up money to pay it. Etc. Leading to all adult transitional moments. I believe that this generation of parents demands very little respect and gives way too much to adults. We love them so much that we will do anything for them. But If we didnt allow them to,say, hit us as toddlers, why would any parent allow this by an adult child and not press charges? Because the stakes are higher? What does it teach them to allow them to get away with stealing, lying, drugging in our home, assaulting us? To me this is a big societal problem. A new one. Parents loving so much that we wont hold our beloved adult kids accountable and buy them what they should buy themselves. The down side is, we have very low expectations of adult children. Then we wonder why they ask for more and dont behave like adults. We dont ask for the minimal, like respect. We are too afraid of seeing them uncomfortable than forcing them to grow up or face the consequences. Or maybe we are afraid they wont love us anymore if we dont do what they demand. Over and over again I read the same stories. Loving parents wont allow a 30 year old to learn to grow up. Or not. They treat us the way we allow. I think not allowing any abuse from anyone is the best solution both for the abused and the abuser. It is hard to get tough on someone you love. I do think it is worth it. Love and light! [/QUOTE]
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