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What is your "true north"?
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<blockquote data-quote="Tanya M" data-source="post: 661688" data-attributes="member: 18516"><p>I really like this statement, it reminds us that there is always hope, there's always a direction we can turn to get our lives back on track.</p><p></p><p>We are all at different levels on this journey called life as we search for our "True North". I have survived some very difficult things in my life; sexual abuse by my bio-father and his death when I was 13, an emotionally abusive ex, cancer, 4 major surgeries, my one and only child becoming a D C and all that goes with that, the death of my mother, the death of my step-dad (who was my rock), leaving a job of 20 years that I loved to move across country to care for my in-laws, having to start over.......... From all of this I have learned that I am stronger than I ever imagined. There were times I didn't think I would make it, I was at the "South Pole" but I did, I found my way "North". I know that no matter what life throws at me I will be ok. I have learned not to project out negative statements as they will bear negative fruit, instead I hold firm in my attitude of gratitude. How "we are" has a lot to do with how we think, how we process our thoughts.</p><p>I am at the mid-point in my life and I don't know how many more days I will have so I choose to live my days to the fullest, I choose to be happy. This does not mean that I won't have times when I will feel deep sorrow. We cannot get through life without being affected by what happens but we get to choose how we will deal with it.</p><p>When my bio-father died suddenly at 50 I was 13. I never had the chance to tell him face to face how much he hurt me, I never got the chance to ask him why, I never knew if he was sorry for what he had done to me.</p><p>For many years I carried the weight of what he done, I just couldn't "get over it". What I finally learned from this is when bad things happen to us there is no "getting over it" but you do <strong><em>get through it. </em></strong>I was holding onto the pain, trying to make sense of it but there is no making sense of it. My bio-father had been dead many years and I was still allowing him to hold my emotions hostage. I had to let go, I was never going to get answers to my questions.</p><p>When my mother died I was 35 and I honestly did not think I could bear the pain. From her death I learned to embrace the pain as it's a testimony to the love I have for her and while she is physically gone, the love with always be with me. </p><p>We learn to develop skills that help us cope. As COM has coined the term "Toolbox" on this site, we take those skills we learn and we keep them in our toolbox.</p><p>I truly feel I am at my "True North" at this point in my life yet I do realize that "life happens" and there may be detours down the road and that's ok, I have my "toolbox" full of life lessons to help guide me.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tanya M, post: 661688, member: 18516"] I really like this statement, it reminds us that there is always hope, there's always a direction we can turn to get our lives back on track. We are all at different levels on this journey called life as we search for our "True North". I have survived some very difficult things in my life; sexual abuse by my bio-father and his death when I was 13, an emotionally abusive ex, cancer, 4 major surgeries, my one and only child becoming a D C and all that goes with that, the death of my mother, the death of my step-dad (who was my rock), leaving a job of 20 years that I loved to move across country to care for my in-laws, having to start over.......... From all of this I have learned that I am stronger than I ever imagined. There were times I didn't think I would make it, I was at the "South Pole" but I did, I found my way "North". I know that no matter what life throws at me I will be ok. I have learned not to project out negative statements as they will bear negative fruit, instead I hold firm in my attitude of gratitude. How "we are" has a lot to do with how we think, how we process our thoughts. I am at the mid-point in my life and I don't know how many more days I will have so I choose to live my days to the fullest, I choose to be happy. This does not mean that I won't have times when I will feel deep sorrow. We cannot get through life without being affected by what happens but we get to choose how we will deal with it. When my bio-father died suddenly at 50 I was 13. I never had the chance to tell him face to face how much he hurt me, I never got the chance to ask him why, I never knew if he was sorry for what he had done to me. For many years I carried the weight of what he done, I just couldn't "get over it". What I finally learned from this is when bad things happen to us there is no "getting over it" but you do [B][I]get through it. [/I][/B]I was holding onto the pain, trying to make sense of it but there is no making sense of it. My bio-father had been dead many years and I was still allowing him to hold my emotions hostage. I had to let go, I was never going to get answers to my questions. When my mother died I was 35 and I honestly did not think I could bear the pain. From her death I learned to embrace the pain as it's a testimony to the love I have for her and while she is physically gone, the love with always be with me. We learn to develop skills that help us cope. As COM has coined the term "Toolbox" on this site, we take those skills we learn and we keep them in our toolbox. I truly feel I am at my "True North" at this point in my life yet I do realize that "life happens" and there may be detours down the road and that's ok, I have my "toolbox" full of life lessons to help guide me. [/QUOTE]
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