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What should I have done?
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<blockquote data-quote="Nancy423" data-source="post: 225883" data-attributes="member: 6118"><p>Well, I was reading that you understood how the basket method works NOW that you've gone thru this dinner episode. You're eyes are opened to what doesn't work, so now just move on to what could work the next time you're faced with this kind of situation. We're all human and make mistakes. By doing this, now you know what not to do <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p><p> </p><p>I just reread Explosive child yesterday at work (it was kinda slow) and so everything is fresh in my mind. one part of the book explaining baskets is very interesting. Write down what things you need difficult child to work on. There are safety issues (basket A), negotiable items (basket B) and pick your battles (non issues, basket C) and then place all your situations in the basket that fits your difficult child the best. Many people start out with- a very full basket C. In this case, i would have also put the Sprite in basket C. I don't think basket C things are parents "giving in".</p><p>*edit: sorry, I didn't realize you were already reading the book! didn't mean to summarize like that.</p><p> </p><p>I know we sometimes forget we need to modify what our own behaviors are. Believe me, stress and frustration make our brains go into overdrive and meltdown especially now during the holidays. Take a deep breath, close your eyes and let it go. Learn from this and move on to the next step. It's all good.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nancy423, post: 225883, member: 6118"] Well, I was reading that you understood how the basket method works NOW that you've gone thru this dinner episode. You're eyes are opened to what doesn't work, so now just move on to what could work the next time you're faced with this kind of situation. We're all human and make mistakes. By doing this, now you know what not to do :) I just reread Explosive child yesterday at work (it was kinda slow) and so everything is fresh in my mind. one part of the book explaining baskets is very interesting. Write down what things you need difficult child to work on. There are safety issues (basket A), negotiable items (basket B) and pick your battles (non issues, basket C) and then place all your situations in the basket that fits your difficult child the best. Many people start out with- a very full basket C. In this case, i would have also put the Sprite in basket C. I don't think basket C things are parents "giving in". *edit: sorry, I didn't realize you were already reading the book! didn't mean to summarize like that. I know we sometimes forget we need to modify what our own behaviors are. Believe me, stress and frustration make our brains go into overdrive and meltdown especially now during the holidays. Take a deep breath, close your eyes and let it go. Learn from this and move on to the next step. It's all good. [/QUOTE]
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