Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
WHAT THE #%^&
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember1" data-source="post: 760647" data-attributes="member: 23706"><p>Kids love both parents. They just do. Disturbed kids are fickle. I would pay less attention to sons daily changes of heart than to reality.</p><p></p><p> If you go to court,Dad may get some custody as Judges like.kids to see both parents these days....you are in two states,? A court case for a change of custody, if that is ex's desire, could be in his state if he wants a custody change. Maybe you should file to get him back in your own state first.</p><p></p><p> At about 12 years old your son has a say in where he wants to primarily live. I only know because two of my siblings with teens have been taken back to court by ex's who now want custody and the kids also want a change. And my sisters have both retained lawyers.</p><p></p><p>My guess is and always has been, from all my friends who are divorced, that the best thing to do if you really want to get your son is to get a lawyer and go back to court. My sister's have had to fight exes too, and their sons are fighting THEM for dads who were not always there as well. My sister's were both sure they would prevail but the cases are becoming complicated. I am NOT trying to scare you but to possibly prepare you.</p><p></p><p>If hub gets a lawyer in his state, you are back in court THERE and custody can change. When kids are small the Judge does not listen to the kid. When the kid is about 12 or so he gets his own lawyer and everything can change. A childs desire does get taken into consideration.</p><p></p><p>You need a lawyer. And proof that Dad is an alcoholic because Judges are used to ex spouses making.masty claims about one another. They do not necessarily buy into it. Proof.</p><p></p><p>If it were me, I would let Son stay with Dad until he is positive he doesn't want to be there or he may tell a Judge something you don't expect and this matters now.</p><p></p><p>Also a Judge will likel give Dad some custody. It is considered desirable in almost every state in 2021 that Father's and Mother share custody. When your son was younger this may have not been so. This is new and all over.</p><p></p><p></p><p>If it sounds confusing, it is. Both my sister's are trying to stay calm in their battles. Both have good lawyers. Both are nervous. Both father's are fighting hard. One father is way behind in child support... I thought he'd lose for sure. The child support issue is being resolved seperately. My poor sister.mow.is supposed to see her son 50/50 and have the time her son refused to go or runs away when Dad makes him go. He is 15 now and says "I don't like Pete (newer husband). He beats me (not true). I won't behave if I have to come here. (He doesn't)."</p><p></p><p>Family Law is not cut and dry and custody can change so if you think your ex may go for custody now, with son at his house, do find a way to hire a lawyer.</p><p></p><p>You'd be amazed how common this scenario you are living through is and in almost all states Dad has as much right to their child as Mom. Laws have changed drastically. Please do what you think is right. This can get messy if Dad won't return him voluntarily. He won't go to jail. It will become a custody battle. I am really sorry. Not being a lawyer I could be wrong but want you to be 100 percent prepared for everything.</p><p></p><p>On the plus, side few parents get FULL custody anymore so you should not lose him completely no matter what.</p><p></p><p>Nyw you can check it out but never heard of any professional allowed to drag a child to an appointment he has to go to. The police let the courts decide these things. Many kids just refuse treatment and kind of hard to do much about it if they won't get into a car....</p><p></p><p>Sending love and hugs. Be proactive. I know how hard this is by talking to my sisters who are loving and we're always so involved with the boys. They were blindsided by the boys sudden interest in their pretty absent fathers.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember1, post: 760647, member: 23706"] Kids love both parents. They just do. Disturbed kids are fickle. I would pay less attention to sons daily changes of heart than to reality. If you go to court,Dad may get some custody as Judges like.kids to see both parents these days....you are in two states,? A court case for a change of custody, if that is ex's desire, could be in his state if he wants a custody change. Maybe you should file to get him back in your own state first. At about 12 years old your son has a say in where he wants to primarily live. I only know because two of my siblings with teens have been taken back to court by ex's who now want custody and the kids also want a change. And my sisters have both retained lawyers. My guess is and always has been, from all my friends who are divorced, that the best thing to do if you really want to get your son is to get a lawyer and go back to court. My sister's have had to fight exes too, and their sons are fighting THEM for dads who were not always there as well. My sister's were both sure they would prevail but the cases are becoming complicated. I am NOT trying to scare you but to possibly prepare you. If hub gets a lawyer in his state, you are back in court THERE and custody can change. When kids are small the Judge does not listen to the kid. When the kid is about 12 or so he gets his own lawyer and everything can change. A childs desire does get taken into consideration. You need a lawyer. And proof that Dad is an alcoholic because Judges are used to ex spouses making.masty claims about one another. They do not necessarily buy into it. Proof. If it were me, I would let Son stay with Dad until he is positive he doesn't want to be there or he may tell a Judge something you don't expect and this matters now. Also a Judge will likel give Dad some custody. It is considered desirable in almost every state in 2021 that Father's and Mother share custody. When your son was younger this may have not been so. This is new and all over. If it sounds confusing, it is. Both my sister's are trying to stay calm in their battles. Both have good lawyers. Both are nervous. Both father's are fighting hard. One father is way behind in child support... I thought he'd lose for sure. The child support issue is being resolved seperately. My poor sister.mow.is supposed to see her son 50/50 and have the time her son refused to go or runs away when Dad makes him go. He is 15 now and says "I don't like Pete (newer husband). He beats me (not true). I won't behave if I have to come here. (He doesn't)." Family Law is not cut and dry and custody can change so if you think your ex may go for custody now, with son at his house, do find a way to hire a lawyer. You'd be amazed how common this scenario you are living through is and in almost all states Dad has as much right to their child as Mom. Laws have changed drastically. Please do what you think is right. This can get messy if Dad won't return him voluntarily. He won't go to jail. It will become a custody battle. I am really sorry. Not being a lawyer I could be wrong but want you to be 100 percent prepared for everything. On the plus, side few parents get FULL custody anymore so you should not lose him completely no matter what. Nyw you can check it out but never heard of any professional allowed to drag a child to an appointment he has to go to. The police let the courts decide these things. Many kids just refuse treatment and kind of hard to do much about it if they won't get into a car.... Sending love and hugs. Be proactive. I know how hard this is by talking to my sisters who are loving and we're always so involved with the boys. They were blindsided by the boys sudden interest in their pretty absent fathers. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
WHAT THE #%^&
Top