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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 357930"><p>It sounds like you are suffering from depression, so I am so glad you are seeing a therapist and might see a specialist (perhaps an MD?). The advice here is also very good! Hang in there...you are moving in the right direction. Perhaps as this change is in progress....there are growing pains. It kinda sounds normal. You've been through a lot of upheaval and are sorting through a lot. You are making your own changes, you are growing, you are coping with losses and setting boundaries. You need a lot of support and I hope you would consider being gentle with yourself.</p><p>Don't forget that the detachment website gave you some strength. Re-read it 100x. Also, literature on boundaries. Work on a "mantra" for yourself. Something like "I can do this." Say it over and over again, especially when you feel weak. Like Suz said, concentrate on what has gone right. Are any of the kids doing well? Okay, well some things have gone right. Is your career going well? Do you have good health? A good friend? I bet there are things in your life you are very proud of. Concentrate on those things. Your difficult children are older now and are making these decisions on there own. Especially if they are older...you must detach. If you are able, you might consider providing mental health services for them. But they and they alone must do the hard work of making good decisions. You can NOT do it for them nor should you. What you can do and must do is work on yourself. AND by doing this, you will be a good role model for them. Control your thoughts. This will lead to more happiness. This will lead to better actions. Not always easy...but soooo much better. If you need to go to the depression specialist...I am sure you will do this and am glad you will do this. Again, you are taking control of your detsiny and making a decision for positive change. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>You asked if any if anyone else felt "defeated." I went through a similar feeling once or twice and it was related to living life with a difficult child. It was VERY hard. What helped? Therapy, keeping myself busy, re-discovering myself, medication for a brief time, exercise, vitamins, re-discovering my spiritual life and later detachment. It was NOT easy...but it was well worth it. My life has TOTALLY BLOSSOMED OVER THE LAST FEW YEARS...I MEAN BIG TIME! </p><p> </p><p>Although you will <strong>DEFINATELY still</strong> need to take any medications recommended to you and <strong>still definately need therapy</strong>, some say that certain vitamins/supplements help with depression. They include: Vitamin B Complex, D3 and Fish Oil Capsules. You might think about trying these. <strong>If you have any health concerns or are on any medications, double check with your doctor first.</strong></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 357930"] It sounds like you are suffering from depression, so I am so glad you are seeing a therapist and might see a specialist (perhaps an MD?). The advice here is also very good! Hang in there...you are moving in the right direction. Perhaps as this change is in progress....there are growing pains. It kinda sounds normal. You've been through a lot of upheaval and are sorting through a lot. You are making your own changes, you are growing, you are coping with losses and setting boundaries. You need a lot of support and I hope you would consider being gentle with yourself. Don't forget that the detachment website gave you some strength. Re-read it 100x. Also, literature on boundaries. Work on a "mantra" for yourself. Something like "I can do this." Say it over and over again, especially when you feel weak. Like Suz said, concentrate on what has gone right. Are any of the kids doing well? Okay, well some things have gone right. Is your career going well? Do you have good health? A good friend? I bet there are things in your life you are very proud of. Concentrate on those things. Your difficult children are older now and are making these decisions on there own. Especially if they are older...you must detach. If you are able, you might consider providing mental health services for them. But they and they alone must do the hard work of making good decisions. You can NOT do it for them nor should you. What you can do and must do is work on yourself. AND by doing this, you will be a good role model for them. Control your thoughts. This will lead to more happiness. This will lead to better actions. Not always easy...but soooo much better. If you need to go to the depression specialist...I am sure you will do this and am glad you will do this. Again, you are taking control of your detsiny and making a decision for positive change. You asked if any if anyone else felt "defeated." I went through a similar feeling once or twice and it was related to living life with a difficult child. It was VERY hard. What helped? Therapy, keeping myself busy, re-discovering myself, medication for a brief time, exercise, vitamins, re-discovering my spiritual life and later detachment. It was NOT easy...but it was well worth it. My life has TOTALLY BLOSSOMED OVER THE LAST FEW YEARS...I MEAN BIG TIME! Although you will [B]DEFINATELY still[/B] need to take any medications recommended to you and [B]still definately need therapy[/B], some say that certain vitamins/supplements help with depression. They include: Vitamin B Complex, D3 and Fish Oil Capsules. You might think about trying these. [B]If you have any health concerns or are on any medications, double check with your doctor first.[/B] [/QUOTE]
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