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Parent Emeritus
When are we assuming too much?
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<blockquote data-quote="SuZir" data-source="post: 621578" data-attributes="member: 14557"><p>I have to agree with you. At times we seem to forget that every situation is unique. That there is no one size fits all model to deal with these issues. Our difficult children are different, we are different, environments and cultures we live in are different. We are in different places in our life. And even more so, we do want different things from life.</p><p></p><p>My difficult child is also still young and I'm still in my early forties. I assume things I want from my life and from my relationship with my kid will not be same twenties years from now. But now they are, what they are and they are not necessarily things many others in this board would want from their life and their relationship with their difficult children. Actions chosen have to be chose according to what you want from any given situation. If the hoped outcomes are different, so are advisable means.</p><p></p><p>I was just thinking about when reading Recoveringenablers great topic about acceptance. Thinking that it could be something I would work to obtain twenty years from now, but how at this point it certainly is not something I would want now.</p><p></p><p>Maybe we should be more careful in telling others what they should do or tell them they are wrong or that their children are this or that (because we really don't know those kids) and be more eager to ask how the poster thinks about the issues and what they want to do and what are their goals in any given situation. And refrain from statements like 'addicts this or that', 'addicts are like this or that', 'people with condition x are like this or that or are not like this or that.' Every addict is different. Every autist is different. Evey person with bipolar is different.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SuZir, post: 621578, member: 14557"] I have to agree with you. At times we seem to forget that every situation is unique. That there is no one size fits all model to deal with these issues. Our difficult children are different, we are different, environments and cultures we live in are different. We are in different places in our life. And even more so, we do want different things from life. My difficult child is also still young and I'm still in my early forties. I assume things I want from my life and from my relationship with my kid will not be same twenties years from now. But now they are, what they are and they are not necessarily things many others in this board would want from their life and their relationship with their difficult children. Actions chosen have to be chose according to what you want from any given situation. If the hoped outcomes are different, so are advisable means. I was just thinking about when reading Recoveringenablers great topic about acceptance. Thinking that it could be something I would work to obtain twenty years from now, but how at this point it certainly is not something I would want now. Maybe we should be more careful in telling others what they should do or tell them they are wrong or that their children are this or that (because we really don't know those kids) and be more eager to ask how the poster thinks about the issues and what they want to do and what are their goals in any given situation. And refrain from statements like 'addicts this or that', 'addicts are like this or that', 'people with condition x are like this or that or are not like this or that.' Every addict is different. Every autist is different. Evey person with bipolar is different. [/QUOTE]
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When are we assuming too much?
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