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General Parenting
when relatives don't want your kids near their kids...
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<blockquote data-quote="katya02" data-source="post: 204896" data-attributes="member: 2884"><p>My thought would be to tell your difficult children exactly why you aren't going, lay it firmly at their door and let them own it. Tell them this is an example of how their behavior affects others and continuing such behaviors will bring more of the same. I would also tell them, if they were my kids, that they have deprived ME of an important family occasion and they will be seeing the consequences of that (choose your own removed privileges here). It's reasonable for them to realize they have harmed you with their behaviors, not just done themselves out of a family visit. When they start in blaming your brother I would firmly restate that it's their responsibility and this is how other reasonable people in society will react to their behaviors as well; then end the conversation and refuse to re-engage. </p><p></p><p>One summer we had to leave a visit at our relatives' place and drive 400 miles home because of difficult child behavior. I've never felt more humiliated. {{{hugs}}} to you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="katya02, post: 204896, member: 2884"] My thought would be to tell your difficult children exactly why you aren't going, lay it firmly at their door and let them own it. Tell them this is an example of how their behavior affects others and continuing such behaviors will bring more of the same. I would also tell them, if they were my kids, that they have deprived ME of an important family occasion and they will be seeing the consequences of that (choose your own removed privileges here). It's reasonable for them to realize they have harmed you with their behaviors, not just done themselves out of a family visit. When they start in blaming your brother I would firmly restate that it's their responsibility and this is how other reasonable people in society will react to their behaviors as well; then end the conversation and refuse to re-engage. One summer we had to leave a visit at our relatives' place and drive 400 miles home because of difficult child behavior. I've never felt more humiliated. {{{hugs}}} to you. [/QUOTE]
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