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Parent Emeritus
When to help our adult children?
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<blockquote data-quote="goldenguru" data-source="post: 94187" data-attributes="member: 1545"><p>Another post in this forum got me thinking this morning.</p><p></p><p>My husband and I are both from families whose parenting ideology went something like: "once you leave home - you've made your bed, now you sleep in it".</p><p></p><p>We would have NEVER dared to ask for money or help of any kind. And there were times when we could have used the help. I specifically remember a time when there was one small can of tuna fish in our cupboard. Period. And a few condiments in the fridge. We did experience some hunger. We were responsible. We both worked. We just had a bad few months.</p><p></p><p>We, on the other hand, do help our kids on occasion. We help with college tuition. We help with groceries sometimes. I will buy my granddaughter used clothes at garage sales.</p><p></p><p>My parents (due to obviously differing views of 'correct' ways to parent adult kids) often criticize us. They point out that they never paid for my college tuition, or bought us groceries, or never babysat our kids.</p><p></p><p>I don't think I'm crippling my kids. They are working hard. They just need a hand every now and then. They are very appreciative.</p><p></p><p>How much do you help your adult kids. How much should we help our kids - or not for that matter?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="goldenguru, post: 94187, member: 1545"] Another post in this forum got me thinking this morning. My husband and I are both from families whose parenting ideology went something like: "once you leave home - you've made your bed, now you sleep in it". We would have NEVER dared to ask for money or help of any kind. And there were times when we could have used the help. I specifically remember a time when there was one small can of tuna fish in our cupboard. Period. And a few condiments in the fridge. We did experience some hunger. We were responsible. We both worked. We just had a bad few months. We, on the other hand, do help our kids on occasion. We help with college tuition. We help with groceries sometimes. I will buy my granddaughter used clothes at garage sales. My parents (due to obviously differing views of 'correct' ways to parent adult kids) often criticize us. They point out that they never paid for my college tuition, or bought us groceries, or never babysat our kids. I don't think I'm crippling my kids. They are working hard. They just need a hand every now and then. They are very appreciative. How much do you help your adult kids. How much should we help our kids - or not for that matter? [/QUOTE]
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When to help our adult children?
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