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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 362425" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>This is just a random thought and I could be way off base.</p><p></p><p>Her need to constantly have a boyfriend (intense fear of being alone) along with her constant calling of these guys and then being able to suddenly turn them off like they never existed reminds me A LOT of borderline personality disorder. I have it and am doing so well now, but her behavior sounds a lot like mine back in the day. I literally panicked if I didn't have a boyfriend. And once one was gone, I frantically moved on to the next one. I can only imagine how I would have utilized the internet to help me do this if it had been available! I'm glad it wasn't. If it is Borderline (BPD) it comes from a sense of weak identity and the horror of feeling you are not connected in THAT way to somebody else. I was diagnosed with a mood disorder myself, and I do have one, but my biggest problem as far as behaviors that were "different" and unhelpful to both myself and others was the borderline. It was also harder to get diagnosed or to get help for, but I managed to do both with a lot of self-help and a lot of motivation.</p><p></p><p>If she has borderline there are many books out there these days to teach you about it and to help you, as her parent, cope and her, as a person with it, to cope. They've come very far in treatment. She sounds very motivated to be a different person. There is really good therapy out there that can help her...dialectal behavioral therapy is new and very successful. Here's my favorite book for beginners:</p><p></p><p><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Borderline-Personality-Disorder-Demystified-Understanding/dp/1569244561" target="_blank">http://www.amazon.com/Borderline-Personality-Disorder-Demystified-Understanding/dp/1569244561</a></p><p></p><p>If you step in, don't be surprised if you can't really change her need to have a boyfriend, even to go to the ends of earth to find one. </p><p></p><p>I hope I'm wrong and somebody has better advice that works. Either way, I wish you all the luck in the world. The internet can be a big problem for our struggling adult children.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 362425, member: 1550"] This is just a random thought and I could be way off base. Her need to constantly have a boyfriend (intense fear of being alone) along with her constant calling of these guys and then being able to suddenly turn them off like they never existed reminds me A LOT of borderline personality disorder. I have it and am doing so well now, but her behavior sounds a lot like mine back in the day. I literally panicked if I didn't have a boyfriend. And once one was gone, I frantically moved on to the next one. I can only imagine how I would have utilized the internet to help me do this if it had been available! I'm glad it wasn't. If it is Borderline (BPD) it comes from a sense of weak identity and the horror of feeling you are not connected in THAT way to somebody else. I was diagnosed with a mood disorder myself, and I do have one, but my biggest problem as far as behaviors that were "different" and unhelpful to both myself and others was the borderline. It was also harder to get diagnosed or to get help for, but I managed to do both with a lot of self-help and a lot of motivation. If she has borderline there are many books out there these days to teach you about it and to help you, as her parent, cope and her, as a person with it, to cope. They've come very far in treatment. She sounds very motivated to be a different person. There is really good therapy out there that can help her...dialectal behavioral therapy is new and very successful. Here's my favorite book for beginners: [URL]http://www.amazon.com/Borderline-Personality-Disorder-Demystified-Understanding/dp/1569244561[/URL] If you step in, don't be surprised if you can't really change her need to have a boyfriend, even to go to the ends of earth to find one. I hope I'm wrong and somebody has better advice that works. Either way, I wish you all the luck in the world. The internet can be a big problem for our struggling adult children. [/QUOTE]
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