Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
when "wants" override thinking ability
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="keista" data-source="post: 463111" data-attributes="member: 11965"><p>Your story reminded me of son in elementary. Not exactly the same scenario, but the same determined rigid thinking. Each term they have an awards ceremony for honor roll and perfect attendance, etc. This one particular time, they were raffling of Disney tickets to the pool of kids with perfect attendance (do not get me started on how ridiculous I think that idea is). Son had made perfect attendance, really wanted the tickets, so by default was convinced that he would win them. Oh BOY! All Heck broke loose when he did not. Logically he understood the whole process and the slim probability that HE would get the tickets, but he was already so emotionally invested in them that it didn't make a difference.</p><p></p><p>Yeah, those silly prizes are a PITA. No different than the toy in the cereal box or fast food meal. Incentivate the kid to harass mom and dad, and you'll sell your product. We don't participate in those things. Fortunately, our school has gotten more creative and we don't have to. (although, I really like this LOCAL coupon idea - sounds like a more 'personal' version of those expensive "Entertainment" coupon books) But way back when they were still bringing them home, I'd tell the kids if I would or wouldn't buy anything. Then they'd whine about not getting prizes, then I'd tell them THEY could go selling stuff - not MY job. That was the end of that.</p><p></p><p>However, there's nothing wrong with providing your own incentives. Anything he's been eyeballing lately? Anything you WANT to get him but are waiting for some sort of occasion? Does he get an allowance? Set up a behavior chart, but make it SPECIFIC. Can't just be for good behavior because he has multiple issues. Maybe start with "Accepting No for an answer" make the goal attainable - 1 week. Might work, might help, might at least open up to more frequent discussions of the issue. </p><p></p><p>((((HUGS)))) Wish there was an easy answer.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="keista, post: 463111, member: 11965"] Your story reminded me of son in elementary. Not exactly the same scenario, but the same determined rigid thinking. Each term they have an awards ceremony for honor roll and perfect attendance, etc. This one particular time, they were raffling of Disney tickets to the pool of kids with perfect attendance (do not get me started on how ridiculous I think that idea is). Son had made perfect attendance, really wanted the tickets, so by default was convinced that he would win them. Oh BOY! All Heck broke loose when he did not. Logically he understood the whole process and the slim probability that HE would get the tickets, but he was already so emotionally invested in them that it didn't make a difference. Yeah, those silly prizes are a PITA. No different than the toy in the cereal box or fast food meal. Incentivate the kid to harass mom and dad, and you'll sell your product. We don't participate in those things. Fortunately, our school has gotten more creative and we don't have to. (although, I really like this LOCAL coupon idea - sounds like a more 'personal' version of those expensive "Entertainment" coupon books) But way back when they were still bringing them home, I'd tell the kids if I would or wouldn't buy anything. Then they'd whine about not getting prizes, then I'd tell them THEY could go selling stuff - not MY job. That was the end of that. However, there's nothing wrong with providing your own incentives. Anything he's been eyeballing lately? Anything you WANT to get him but are waiting for some sort of occasion? Does he get an allowance? Set up a behavior chart, but make it SPECIFIC. Can't just be for good behavior because he has multiple issues. Maybe start with "Accepting No for an answer" make the goal attainable - 1 week. Might work, might help, might at least open up to more frequent discussions of the issue. ((((HUGS)))) Wish there was an easy answer. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
when "wants" override thinking ability
Top