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General Parenting
Which parent carries the autism genes
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 467754" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>As to the curious part, there isn't really a way to know at this time. Chances are he gets some from you, some from dad and some is just him. </p><p></p><p>As to the guilt, I had a lot of health problems as a kid and have more as an adult. I remember discussing thinking that maybe I shouldn't have kids because I wouldn't want them to have what I have - I was 15 or 16 and talking with my mom on one of the 90 min rides to the doctor office.</p><p></p><p>She asked me if I would have wanted her not to have me if she had known of her health issues at the time she was first pregnant with me. It really made me think. In NO way have I EVER blamed my mom or dad for my health problems except for a few specific things that were caused by my bro's violence to me. the rest of the problems? Luck of the draw. No one gets a guarantee.</p><p></p><p>Remembering that talk helped me not feel guilty as much or as often as I otherwise would have when my kids started showing problems. </p><p></p><p>just one way to look at it. in my opinion blame never helped any of us, whether we are the parent or the child. Esp when it is NOT somethng that we can actually know came from one side or the other. </p><p></p><p>Gender? Well that is a whole other ballgame. I still remember laughing my head off at my former science teacher and football coach father in law when he called and TOLD me that it had BETTER be a girl this time. When I stopped laughing I told him to think back on biology class - I had NO control over that one!!! He sputtered a while, we didn't get on well then and he daughter NOT like his son's much younger wife telling him who to take his "order" too, but stepmil was on the other phone and was laughing as hard as I was.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 467754, member: 1233"] As to the curious part, there isn't really a way to know at this time. Chances are he gets some from you, some from dad and some is just him. As to the guilt, I had a lot of health problems as a kid and have more as an adult. I remember discussing thinking that maybe I shouldn't have kids because I wouldn't want them to have what I have - I was 15 or 16 and talking with my mom on one of the 90 min rides to the doctor office. She asked me if I would have wanted her not to have me if she had known of her health issues at the time she was first pregnant with me. It really made me think. In NO way have I EVER blamed my mom or dad for my health problems except for a few specific things that were caused by my bro's violence to me. the rest of the problems? Luck of the draw. No one gets a guarantee. Remembering that talk helped me not feel guilty as much or as often as I otherwise would have when my kids started showing problems. just one way to look at it. in my opinion blame never helped any of us, whether we are the parent or the child. Esp when it is NOT somethng that we can actually know came from one side or the other. Gender? Well that is a whole other ballgame. I still remember laughing my head off at my former science teacher and football coach father in law when he called and TOLD me that it had BETTER be a girl this time. When I stopped laughing I told him to think back on biology class - I had NO control over that one!!! He sputtered a while, we didn't get on well then and he daughter NOT like his son's much younger wife telling him who to take his "order" too, but stepmil was on the other phone and was laughing as hard as I was. [/QUOTE]
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