Hello dear friend. I am so sorry you are having a tough time. You are doing better than you think you are. Detaching from a child that we love is not an easy task. It took me many years of extreme heartache to finally really let go. While I live a very full and happy life I still have moments of sadness and that's ok. My mom passed away 17 years ago and I still have moments of sadness when I think about her and that's ok.
We are always going to have moments of sadness in our lives and we just have to embrace it, feel it, then let it go and move on.
I went through the same thing with my son calling me to tell me he was going to freeze to death or starve to death and he always found a way, always. I was a 1000 miles away from him and there was nothing I could do for him. I also had to remind myself of all that I had done for him, all the chances I had given him only to have him throw it all away.
Remember, our d-cs have made the choice to live their lives the way want to. They don't plan for things to go bad and when it does they want someone to bail them out, to fix their problems and make everything ok.
Hang in there BG. You will get through this. Keep reading and keep posting.
I an sending you a really big hug!!!
