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General Parenting
Why does my son complain so often?
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<blockquote data-quote="keista" data-source="post: 445639" data-attributes="member: 11965"><p>Not necessarily. He understands in the moment, but not the full ramifications. After all, he's just 4. Take this one step further. Have him repeat the words "I will NOT get any other toys" I was having the same difficulties until I started doing that with DD1. As smart as she was, saying and nodding yes was not fully registering for her. I still do it when she hits "extreme boredom" and I indulge her with yet another new crafting kit or whatnot and she's 10 now.</p><p></p><p>You can even take it one further by making it CLEAR he wanted a toupi (or whatever the next thing is) and if he gets this newer item then NO toupi. AND make him say the words out loud. Then when he melts down and you remind him of the 'deal' you struck, he will be more able to retrieve that memory. He still won't be happy about it, but if you keep it up, by age 5 he will have formed better decision making and coping skills (we hope)</p><p></p><p>RE whining. DD1 did that too. We called her Princess Whines-a-lot. Every request was a whine. I would stop, and tell her yes you can have it if you ask properly. She tried, she failed. I would then tell her exactly how to ask me - tone, inflection, etc. She'd repeat me, and then her request was granted. Don't know exactly when it stopped, but eventually she stopped the constant whining about everything. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p><p></p><p>Reality is, that he's just going to take a bit longer than other kids to learn these skills. If you make subtle changes in how you deal with them and stay consistent, he will learn.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="keista, post: 445639, member: 11965"] Not necessarily. He understands in the moment, but not the full ramifications. After all, he's just 4. Take this one step further. Have him repeat the words "I will NOT get any other toys" I was having the same difficulties until I started doing that with DD1. As smart as she was, saying and nodding yes was not fully registering for her. I still do it when she hits "extreme boredom" and I indulge her with yet another new crafting kit or whatnot and she's 10 now. You can even take it one further by making it CLEAR he wanted a toupi (or whatever the next thing is) and if he gets this newer item then NO toupi. AND make him say the words out loud. Then when he melts down and you remind him of the 'deal' you struck, he will be more able to retrieve that memory. He still won't be happy about it, but if you keep it up, by age 5 he will have formed better decision making and coping skills (we hope) RE whining. DD1 did that too. We called her Princess Whines-a-lot. Every request was a whine. I would stop, and tell her yes you can have it if you ask properly. She tried, she failed. I would then tell her exactly how to ask me - tone, inflection, etc. She'd repeat me, and then her request was granted. Don't know exactly when it stopped, but eventually she stopped the constant whining about everything. :) Reality is, that he's just going to take a bit longer than other kids to learn these skills. If you make subtle changes in how you deal with them and stay consistent, he will learn. [/QUOTE]
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Why does my son complain so often?
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