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Wondering what other shoes can drop now
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<blockquote data-quote="Babbs" data-source="post: 303488" data-attributes="member: 3820"><p>Susiestar-</p><p></p><p>My difficult child is 9 years old. I've approached him in the past about martial arts and he hasn't expressed an interest before now. I actually met my ex in a karate class and have taken both Shotokon Karate as well as American Freestyle Karate for years. Yesterday we discussed how it should be used for self defense only and what the consequences would be if he tried using the few things he knows at school. difficult child expressed interest in learning how to use the martial arts techniques for controlling himself and helping manage his temper - I really do think that when he has these explosive episodes it scares him as much as it scares us. Right now it's more of a money issue - on strike means no paycheck coming in <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite3" alt=":(" title="Frown :(" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":(" /> I'll try to get difficult child connected to one of the classes through parks and rec before I enroll him at a dojo - most of the dojos around here require a year's commitment!</p><p></p><p>Unfortunately in my state the dept of ed doesn't provide advocates for parents. There's a free parents group who helps advocate but the waiting list is long and unfortunately I knew significantly more about the law and his rights than the last two people I spoke with through them. Part of my dilema (sp?) with the school district is that I'm an employee - and I work in special education. I managed to push an evaluation past the Special Education team at his school last year and got difficult child qualified for Speech Language Pathologist (SLP) for artic and pragmatic language. But his IQ on the WISQ had a 26 point spread (which invalidates it according to his psychologist) and the school psychologist used the invalid IQ for the discrepancy measure compared with his academics (which also had huge spreads) which ended up disqualifying him for special education services. Grr... I had asked for a non-verbal IQ and was denied by the school psychologist and had gone all the way up to the Special Education director and got bounced back to the school building and told to request a re-evaluation which the school psychologist denied to do. The school psychologist I think has felt that I was challenging her professionally and even stated to difficult child's outside psychologist that she felt he was being "over pathologized". It's frustrating to work in special education and understand how the tests work and what the numbers mean and know that there's three other pscyhologists in the same district that would have qualified him for services with the exact same test scores. I was in the process of asking for an IEE when I discovered I was pregnant. Because of how heavyhanded this district is towards its employees, my SO and I were prepared to be taken to due process after requesting the IEE, but with the family changes we had to step back and not push it at that time. So now I'm kind of stuck trying to figure out do I add on more stress once school starts or do I make it take a back seat? difficult child seems to be dealing with the idea of a new baby in the household, but actually living with the changes may certainly well be a different ball of wax.</p><p></p><p>My SO keeps suggesting that we just take difficult child off his medications and let him crash and burn at school but I have a really hard time with that - we've come so far and I just feel that pushing failure like that would just set difficult child back with his self esteem and his social skills.</p><p></p><p></p><p>On an upbeat funny thing happened note, today I took him to the picket line ( I have done so for the past week) and one of the other teachers brought her 9 month old daughter with her. difficult child was entranced, trying to get the baby to talk and interact with him. difficult child took one of his toys and was telling the baby "see how his tail wiggles back and forth, just like a sperm or a tadpole." He had all of us laughing and I had to explain to him why although what he said was factual, he may not want to use sperm as an example in future!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Babbs, post: 303488, member: 3820"] Susiestar- My difficult child is 9 years old. I've approached him in the past about martial arts and he hasn't expressed an interest before now. I actually met my ex in a karate class and have taken both Shotokon Karate as well as American Freestyle Karate for years. Yesterday we discussed how it should be used for self defense only and what the consequences would be if he tried using the few things he knows at school. difficult child expressed interest in learning how to use the martial arts techniques for controlling himself and helping manage his temper - I really do think that when he has these explosive episodes it scares him as much as it scares us. Right now it's more of a money issue - on strike means no paycheck coming in :( I'll try to get difficult child connected to one of the classes through parks and rec before I enroll him at a dojo - most of the dojos around here require a year's commitment! Unfortunately in my state the dept of ed doesn't provide advocates for parents. There's a free parents group who helps advocate but the waiting list is long and unfortunately I knew significantly more about the law and his rights than the last two people I spoke with through them. Part of my dilema (sp?) with the school district is that I'm an employee - and I work in special education. I managed to push an evaluation past the Special Education team at his school last year and got difficult child qualified for Speech Language Pathologist (SLP) for artic and pragmatic language. But his IQ on the WISQ had a 26 point spread (which invalidates it according to his psychologist) and the school psychologist used the invalid IQ for the discrepancy measure compared with his academics (which also had huge spreads) which ended up disqualifying him for special education services. Grr... I had asked for a non-verbal IQ and was denied by the school psychologist and had gone all the way up to the Special Education director and got bounced back to the school building and told to request a re-evaluation which the school psychologist denied to do. The school psychologist I think has felt that I was challenging her professionally and even stated to difficult child's outside psychologist that she felt he was being "over pathologized". It's frustrating to work in special education and understand how the tests work and what the numbers mean and know that there's three other pscyhologists in the same district that would have qualified him for services with the exact same test scores. I was in the process of asking for an IEE when I discovered I was pregnant. Because of how heavyhanded this district is towards its employees, my SO and I were prepared to be taken to due process after requesting the IEE, but with the family changes we had to step back and not push it at that time. So now I'm kind of stuck trying to figure out do I add on more stress once school starts or do I make it take a back seat? difficult child seems to be dealing with the idea of a new baby in the household, but actually living with the changes may certainly well be a different ball of wax. My SO keeps suggesting that we just take difficult child off his medications and let him crash and burn at school but I have a really hard time with that - we've come so far and I just feel that pushing failure like that would just set difficult child back with his self esteem and his social skills. On an upbeat funny thing happened note, today I took him to the picket line ( I have done so for the past week) and one of the other teachers brought her 9 month old daughter with her. difficult child was entranced, trying to get the baby to talk and interact with him. difficult child took one of his toys and was telling the baby "see how his tail wiggles back and forth, just like a sperm or a tadpole." He had all of us laughing and I had to explain to him why although what he said was factual, he may not want to use sperm as an example in future! [/QUOTE]
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