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Family of Origin
Work and Germany; Benedictines and Buddhists: Attitude
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 672987" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Well, I went to bed. Kind of scared, because M came in to tell me he was going to bed. I did not follow to finish a post. The second night in a row, I did not go to bed with him. </p><p></p><p>I laid down. I remembered I had not taken my benadryl. I began thinking about this thread and I thought about how meaningful it would be to really work this through. To become organized, and deliberate and conscientious and conscious with respect to my home, and papers and yard, and clothes. And things. </p><p></p><p>And then the thought that came into my mind was this: <em>I want to kill myself.</em></p><p><em></em></p><p>No wonder it is hard for me to clean my house. Now wonder my wanting is out of control. It is life or death. </p><p></p><p>So I got up to get the Benadryl and to record this. So that I am committed. I mean not committed as in 5150, but committed.</p><p></p><p>Great.</p><p></p><p>This thread will either save me or kill me. I mean, not really, but kind of. This is a life or death thread. </p><p></p><p>Thank you, Cedar. I guess.</p><p></p><p>COPA</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 672987, member: 18958"] Well, I went to bed. Kind of scared, because M came in to tell me he was going to bed. I did not follow to finish a post. The second night in a row, I did not go to bed with him. I laid down. I remembered I had not taken my benadryl. I began thinking about this thread and I thought about how meaningful it would be to really work this through. To become organized, and deliberate and conscientious and conscious with respect to my home, and papers and yard, and clothes. And things. And then the thought that came into my mind was this: [I]I want to kill myself. [/I] No wonder it is hard for me to clean my house. Now wonder my wanting is out of control. It is life or death.[I] [/I] So I got up to get the Benadryl and to record this. So that I am committed. I mean not committed as in 5150, but committed. Great. This thread will either save me or kill me. I mean, not really, but kind of. This is a life or death thread. Thank you, Cedar. I guess. COPA [/QUOTE]
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Work and Germany; Benedictines and Buddhists: Attitude
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