Well, where would the world be if there were not people like us? (Actually, it just now occurred to me that it might be even a better world than it is, if we could let go of a thing and devote our incredible energies to those things we can change.)
But we are talking about our own children, here.
About how we, being uber-responsible types, would look at what is happening with our contributions to the world (through our children).
You know, we have all posted about the guilt we feel over what our children are doing instead of having taken the educations, the advice, the knowledge of how to make it, of how to cherish and find joy ~ any of the good things we had to give them, in...er...SPADES.
:O)
That was a joke. Referencing the post on polishing up a spade.
*******
We have all posted about that very thing. About that extra burden of shame we carry because of what our children are doing, instead.
And it is shaming?
But I think I am getting a little p****** off, actually.
I think that is a part of getting healthier, too. It isn't just that we reclaim our right to be angry instead of defensive or outright cowed by it all. It's that we begin seeing our situations relative to the kids so differently. It was my responsibility to raise them well, true.
But...where does their responsibility come in?
And surely, stealing from your own mother, from your own father.... As one of us posted earlier, she had blamed the drugs.
I always did, too.
I don't know how to look at people I love and still love them in the faces of some of these true things.
And I am so committed to loving them, to believing in them, no matter what.
Hear that little sound? That little rasping sound? That is the sound of Cedar, polishing that particular spade for all she's worth.
Cedar
P.S. Witz responded on another thread about a coin collection that had been stolen. A little later, she posts about what it really meant to her, inside where the monetary value of a thing doesn't matter.
It's heartbreaking.
