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Substance Abuse
Yet another "First" for Mr. McWeedyBrain (NOT!)
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<blockquote data-quote="Mikey" data-source="post: 49387" data-attributes="member: 3579"><p><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: DDD</div><div class="ubbcode-body">..."if you know his Dad you might tell him that his eyes probably were dialated from Ex or cold tablets or other pills not pot". Sad thought but I decided to share it.</div></div></p><p></p><p>That's always been a thought in the back of my mind, but he's been drug tested so many times where all that's turned up is weed (except for the very first test, which also showed amphetamines, but then again he may have been taking his ADD medications off and on then). And all the tests were the 'full spectrum' 35-indicator battery. One even included a new urine test for alchohol abuse (I never knew there was such a thing, but there is).</p><p></p><p>I've never ruled out other drugs, but since difficult child has adopted his "I don't care what you think" attitude, he's never hidden it from us when he's stoned. I've gotten to know his McWeedy persona quite well, and I've seen him when he's wacked out on other stuff and drunk as well.</p><p></p><p>That night, I'd give 100 to 1 that he was stoned.</p><p></p><p>But then again, I guess we'll find out soon enough. He starts his "mediccal study" in a week, and they do weekly drug tests. While I don't think he cares if we know he smokes pot, he knows that we completely flip when he does anything else (like drinking, or the one time I found out he did X last year). In his mind, he can "manage us" if he sticks to pot and a little booze. I doubt he'd risk anything more than that, since in the end I think he <strong>does</strong> fear a complete parental meltdown that ends with him getting tossed on his duff out the door.</p><p></p><p>But I say doubt, not complete disbelief. Just like that night when he told the cop he hadn't been drinking, he had the chance to prove it by blowing in the breathalyzer. He says that he only tokes and drinks "a little". He'll have a chance to prove that, too. While we may have been a little too lenient in the past on the weed, he knows that if he escalates beyond that he's forcing our hand.</p><p></p><p>He doesn't "formally" know it yet, but we're already moving forward on forcing him to make some tough choices. He's already told his girlfriend that we're "throwing him out when he's 18", so he knows something's coming soon. he just doesn't know what's coming.... </p><p></p><p>When we finally move, ff he's further down the dark side than we know, it will only make it easier for wife and I to do what must be done. And we'll do it soon, because we all agree that his acting out is both sucking the life out of the family, and causing problems for my daughter at a crucial point in her life. wife and I want her to see us deal with difficult child fairly and with compassion, but to also see us make the hard choice and do what has to be done (if needed).</p><p></p><p>If it's any consolation, she's already seen her best friend's family ask one 18YO son to leave for the same reasons, and her 17YO brother may get the same birthday present when he turns 18 (for the same reasons - they're all part of the Pothead Posse). I don't know how easy child feels about what her friend's family did, but I think she understands how bad the problems were that led to that action. </p><p></p><p>I wonder what she thinks about her own family, given her exposure to the meltdown of her friends family? I'd ask, but she seems to either tee off or shut down any time I try to ease the topic into our discussions.</p><p></p><p>For us, though, it's like going off the high-dive for the first time. At the edge, bouncing a bit, and you can't get off because there's a line 20 deep behind you on the ladder. You have to go off - the only question is when, and what will you do on the way down?</p><p></p><p>We're there, on the edge, trying to decide our next move.</p><p></p><p>Mikey</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Mikey, post: 49387, member: 3579"] <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: DDD</div><div class="ubbcode-body">..."if you know his Dad you might tell him that his eyes probably were dialated from Ex or cold tablets or other pills not pot". Sad thought but I decided to share it.</div></div> That's always been a thought in the back of my mind, but he's been drug tested so many times where all that's turned up is weed (except for the very first test, which also showed amphetamines, but then again he may have been taking his ADD medications off and on then). And all the tests were the 'full spectrum' 35-indicator battery. One even included a new urine test for alchohol abuse (I never knew there was such a thing, but there is). I've never ruled out other drugs, but since difficult child has adopted his "I don't care what you think" attitude, he's never hidden it from us when he's stoned. I've gotten to know his McWeedy persona quite well, and I've seen him when he's wacked out on other stuff and drunk as well. That night, I'd give 100 to 1 that he was stoned. But then again, I guess we'll find out soon enough. He starts his "mediccal study" in a week, and they do weekly drug tests. While I don't think he cares if we know he smokes pot, he knows that we completely flip when he does anything else (like drinking, or the one time I found out he did X last year). In his mind, he can "manage us" if he sticks to pot and a little booze. I doubt he'd risk anything more than that, since in the end I think he [b]does[/b] fear a complete parental meltdown that ends with him getting tossed on his duff out the door. But I say doubt, not complete disbelief. Just like that night when he told the cop he hadn't been drinking, he had the chance to prove it by blowing in the breathalyzer. He says that he only tokes and drinks "a little". He'll have a chance to prove that, too. While we may have been a little too lenient in the past on the weed, he knows that if he escalates beyond that he's forcing our hand. He doesn't "formally" know it yet, but we're already moving forward on forcing him to make some tough choices. He's already told his girlfriend that we're "throwing him out when he's 18", so he knows something's coming soon. he just doesn't know what's coming.... When we finally move, ff he's further down the dark side than we know, it will only make it easier for wife and I to do what must be done. And we'll do it soon, because we all agree that his acting out is both sucking the life out of the family, and causing problems for my daughter at a crucial point in her life. wife and I want her to see us deal with difficult child fairly and with compassion, but to also see us make the hard choice and do what has to be done (if needed). If it's any consolation, she's already seen her best friend's family ask one 18YO son to leave for the same reasons, and her 17YO brother may get the same birthday present when he turns 18 (for the same reasons - they're all part of the Pothead Posse). I don't know how easy child feels about what her friend's family did, but I think she understands how bad the problems were that led to that action. I wonder what she thinks about her own family, given her exposure to the meltdown of her friends family? I'd ask, but she seems to either tee off or shut down any time I try to ease the topic into our discussions. For us, though, it's like going off the high-dive for the first time. At the edge, bouncing a bit, and you can't get off because there's a line 20 deep behind you on the ladder. You have to go off - the only question is when, and what will you do on the way down? We're there, on the edge, trying to decide our next move. Mikey [/QUOTE]
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