A bit of background. husband is autistic. I handle all the money. Any attempt on my part to get him to even look at the money he shuts down (back to me, absorbed in a computer). He has very little impulse control and is ashamed of it. Our money situation has always been very stressful, down to the wire, never having enough. Now its worse. We got by because certain companies were willing to wait until the tax return got here every year to get paid. Now with the economy they aren't willing to wait. Its not just one company it's 3 that have changed. This is at a time where we have got to look to every like we are 'with it' and can handle difficult child 1 and all our other problems. We have got to have more income. husband agrees with this. I've tried starting my own company. Its not making any sales. husband says he is looking for work. He has been looking since May. His looking has devolved into watching movies all morning. Before Sep. I tried to work with him on looking. Wife instructing husband did not work well. I tried doing most of it for him. I spent 4-6 hours a day filling out applications. Doing his resume. (Actually I took what he had and made it readable. He had it all small font with no spacing.) He was ok with me just doing most of the work. He actually got a job interview that way. I can't do that any more. Between difficult child 1's behavior, X's behavior, lawyers, schools, cleaning, and my own PTSD I just can't do his job search for him. mother in law has agreed to come out and help with the job search. I've talked to husband about her coming. He agrees to her coming. mother in law is no saint. She is Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) about cleaning to the point if cps knew what was going on when husband was growing up all the kids would've been taken away. She also doesn't believe in husband's diagnosis. (I have talked with her about how hard it will be for her to let me and the kids make mistakes with the house. And if she spends all her time cleaning here then when she leaves it'll all just fall apart. I need to learn how to take care of the house. ) I am desperate. I like hot running water and we are starting to get shut off notices. (They'll be taken care of temporarily, but the programs I'm using are not a long term solution.) The problem comes in that even though I talk to husband about her coming and why she is coming it is not sinking in. He thinks that she will come and clean the house and because 'he doesn't have to worry about the house anymore' then he'll be able to look for a job. Yeah. This is implying he is taking care of the house now. He isn't. He might cook a meal once a week. (And leave me with so many dishes to do it takes me days to do them all.) Or he might change the laundry over (and leave piles of clean laundry all over the place.) He might do the dishes. (And then I'll have dirty and clean dishes mixed together and the kitchen still isn't actually clean.) That is it (Maybe he'll do these things once a week.) He spends his mornings watching movies. After work he comes home and watches movies. Just in Oct. he has gone threw all the seasons of CSI, X-files, and mythbusters. I know I am part of the problem. As you can imagine confrontation with any male raises my PTSD to awful levels. I'm thinking of writing husband an e-mail (much easier for him to communicate by e-mail). I'm still working on what to put in the e-mail. Sorry this is so long. Its not a topic a talk to many people about.