BusynMember1
Well-Known Member
Yes, it is. I have the same situation. I have a very strong sense of God in my life and ask Him every day to watch over my grandson, heal my daughter and help me. This does comfort me.
If you have confidence she would give the children the gifts...and if you believe you would feel some peace...whether or not she ignores you...I would think about sending gifts.I think she would give the gifts to her children.
I think detaching from the outcome is almost impossible for me. I need to really psychiatric myself up for this, and maybe I will decide I'm just not able to handle the hurt yet.If you have confidence she would give the children the gifts...and if you believe you would feel some peace...whether or not she ignores you...I would think about sending gifts.
This is how I think I would do it: I would decide upfront how often to send gifts (each child's birthday, for example, and holidays that you observe). I think I might send a little something to each child, on each child's birthday, so none feel left out (I would enclose a note to say something like, this is to celebrate x's birthday), and then I would adhere to the schedule automatically. The important thing is to ask yourself if you can let go of the expectation of any specific result, either a response from your daughter, or from the kids.
So true and yet we just keep loving.Me too.
I know few people who have had a smooth close relationship with adopted kids.