TeDo
CD Hall of Fame
First, difficult child 2 has always been an act now think later kind of kid. However, what changed his status from easy child/difficult child to difficult child 2 is that he has become increasingly impulsive and his reactions are physical, no matter who it is. He isn't on any medications but has the Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) diagnosis and I know puberty has made things worse. When someone says ANYTHING that makes him mad (a lot of times it's his misinterpretation that causes it), he lashes out phisically. Since he primarily plays with his brother and younger kids, he is picking on kids much smaller that him. His therapist and I talked about how he's old enough and big enough now that he could be legally charged if he keeps hurting these little 7 year olds when he gets mad. He doesn't beat them up or anything. What he usually does is push them or slap their hand or swing something at them. He knows as soon as he does it that he's wrong because he leaves immediately after and goes home. But he's 13, 5'10" and 170 lbs. His response is always "that's just who I am!!!" whenever he is confronted with his anger issues. He is grounded from ALL privileges (includes tv, radio, computer, game systems, leaving the house, phone, EVERYTHING) for 24 hours because he was very aggressive with difficult child 1 last night in front of one of the 7 year olds. It turns out that difficult child 2 heard something difficult child 1 said entirely wrong and went into a rage over it.
On the other hand, difficult child 1 is still sleeping!!! When he endured the physical aggression of difficult child 2 last night for over 20 minutes, he didn't lash back at all (verified by difficult child 2 who you know would tell in a heartbeat)! Instead he called me to tell me what all happened. This is the second time this week he's been on the receiving end of difficult child 2's rage and has not done ANYTHING to lash back. difficult child 1 doesn't complain about schoolwork AT ALL!! He still gets frustrated when he doesn't understand something but he sits with me while I explain it to him. He's actually working hard and is, as of now, getting A's & B's (even on a good day it was B's & C's in past years). He is happier, more flexible, more tolerant, AND he SLEEPS!!!
Now if I could just get difficult child 2 to a "happy" place (meaning content, typical kid) but I realize he's had to deal with a lot with difficult child 1 for the last several months so I guess I can't totally blame him for being angry but I do blame him for how he handles it.
On the other hand, difficult child 1 is still sleeping!!! When he endured the physical aggression of difficult child 2 last night for over 20 minutes, he didn't lash back at all (verified by difficult child 2 who you know would tell in a heartbeat)! Instead he called me to tell me what all happened. This is the second time this week he's been on the receiving end of difficult child 2's rage and has not done ANYTHING to lash back. difficult child 1 doesn't complain about schoolwork AT ALL!! He still gets frustrated when he doesn't understand something but he sits with me while I explain it to him. He's actually working hard and is, as of now, getting A's & B's (even on a good day it was B's & C's in past years). He is happier, more flexible, more tolerant, AND he SLEEPS!!!
Now if I could just get difficult child 2 to a "happy" place (meaning content, typical kid) but I realize he's had to deal with a lot with difficult child 1 for the last several months so I guess I can't totally blame him for being angry but I do blame him for how he handles it.
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