i'm going to lose it today

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Jena, Feb 25, 2008.

  1. Jena

    Jena New Member

    hi

    wow is all i can say. difficult child is a mess and driving me absolutely nuts. there is no way id home school number 1 because i do not believe it's right for her number 2 i cna't handle it. shes' so so needy academically and emotionally. she can't do a single thing on her own needs redirection at every turn.

    she's capable of doing it yet she's whining thru it all each and every page.

    trying to get her out of house for 4 hours today now this ontop of everything else going on with me right now. a little bit much for me to be perfectly honest the xanax may find it's way into my mouth today

    ok thanks had to get that out
     
  2. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    So sorry. Xanax sounds like something you both need!
     
  3. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    Just keep thinking that answers are one evaluation closer to coming...

    Then hang on and enjoy the ride...and thanks for flying with difficult child Air.

    Hugs.
     
  4. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    Whenever ANY of my kids began whining or getting themselves worked up to a panic over their work, I'd threaten to walk away (and would, if it didn't stop INSTANTLY). I would only come back if they promised to be calm and also polite to me; I was only trying to help, and if they didn't want my help they only had to say so. I wouldn't stand for any abuse or tantrum, over schoolwork.

    Of course, this meant that when I was driving them to do their work, a tantrum would get them out of work. I would reserve the "I'll walk away" routine for when THEY were motivated to do it.

    I could get them motivated by pointing out, "I'm not the one who has to hand this in tomorrow morning. I can just get on with organising the shopping, planning dinner tomorrow night, getting some sleep... I finished my school days long ago. I can walk away from this, I do not have to help you, I only choose to if you're polite to me."

    When they quietened down, I would talk them through it but I would also try to get them to work independently. "If you can't do that bit, leave it and move on; once you've done everything you can, we'll go through it together."

    I did find that a lot of the rudeness, a lot of the "I can't do it, I'm so stupid, why do they ask these silly questions in such a dumb way?" etc were born of panic and uncertainty. And while they're mid-panic, they're not going to get much work done, not effectively. And if I have to stand around listening to them panic, I'm going to want to wring their necks...

    It works for me.

    Marg
     
  5. Jena

    Jena New Member

    hi

    hope everyone's well and ok if we're on a flight on difficult child air can i please have a cocktail??? lol

    well i'm getting some answer's myself now via therapy which will only help me dealing wihth little difficult child at this point.

    i suffer from ptsd apparentley, so that's what the underlying anxiety within me has been about. something that occurred years ago things are hitting me now believe it or not.

    anyhow evaluation's tomorrow we live in afternoon for the hotel.

    thanks again

    Jen :)
     
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