GMStrength02
New Member
Hello. I'm new to this sight. I'm the mother of three (9,12,19) and I recently had to make a choice to either continue to enable my 19 yr old son or finally stop. The breaking point was the disrespect that he showed to my mother (his grandmother). Enough was enough here at my home. Everything from talking back, refusal to really try to gain employment,not keeping jobs that my friends helped him get, not respecting my house or rules, leaving doors unlocked, having friends over when told not to, sometimes irrational behavior in my opinion due to drug use and absolutely not taking any responsibility for his actions and blaming others. He added stealing cash out of my room to the mix and he had to go. That's when my mother stepped in and offered for him to stay with her. That went ok for about 2 months and he recently started to disrespect her. ( I never ever thought he would.) He basically refused to follow her rules about coming and going from her home. Long story short my brother came down in a flash and removed him from her house. He tried talking to my son for the 10,000th time, but with no success. My son stated that he's not trying to gain anyone's respect. My guess is he is very angry and what life has dealt him, no good absentee father, a step father that was not a true father figure and losing my father, his grandfather whom he adored. I take full responsibility for my part and my choices in life,which were not always the best. Staying in a marriage for the sake of children for example. But he has had sooooo much positivity, support and love. People have constantly been on his side and encouraging him to do the right things. He was truly blessed, own room,TV, cable, phone.(Those comforts I eventually took away when he was here) But at the end of the day what we think and how we think is not what matters. It's what and how he thinks. Anyways...He came to my home ringing the doorbell and banging on my back window non stop. I called the police and they took him to a friends who's mom would not allow him to stay there. He slept at a park near my home and I don't of his where abouts now. It's been 3 days. I know I did what had to be done but my motherly instincts and guilt keep kicking in. He is not a bad person and I love him dearly. This is harder than I thought it would be, mostly on the heart but I'm trying to be strong. I did not go to work today as I've not slept well and not eating much. Does is it get better or any easier to cope? (sorry if this was long.)