just diagnosed with leukemia

[pepperidge]

TThank you all for all the well wishes and board juju and prayer and whatever. I have already had a good week of treatment on chemo with good response, but it is still an 8 month marathon or so. Reflecting on raising difficult children, at least the only person I have to worry about taking medicine right now is me. I realize that I can enjoy one day at a time. We are still waiting for final studies to be done and will be meeting with doctor in a couple of weeks to try to nail down the long term plan which will probably involve bone marrow transplant. that is kind of scary. But i have this sense that i can focus on being on board as much as possible with the treatment.

I still think about all the wonderful women on the substancr abuse forum. I think watching your chidren self destruct and having to practice detachment would seem like the ultimate nightmare. At least here i am in charge ef myself. Suffering comes in all forms. What amazes me on a daily basis is how much collective strength we can muster on behalf of our kids.

I WILL check in a few weeks. Keep me in your thoughts as I have so many times for you. Is there some mantra or thought that has gotten you through a difficult time/
Thanks for being there ladies. I feel so buoyed by all these hands holding me up.

 

[Tiapet]

Pepperidge my mantra has always been "Life on Life's terms". Seems I have Murphy's Law happening in my life all the time, you know what ever can go wrong will go wrong in every sense and every part of my life and health it seems. Long ago I adopted that and while some tend to think of it as a negative connotation I do not. I see it as I have accepted that life is going to throw out what ever it has to offer and I will meet it on it's terms and deal with it on those terms as best as I can and move forward knowingly and accordingly. It has always brought me through much of the worst stuff.

Many more thoughts to you and hugs.

 

[1905]

I was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2000 at age 34. I know how scared you feel. I am so sorry that you have to go through this! The best piece of advice anyone ever gave me when I was sick, was this: You will get your life back. Sometimes you will feel like a piece of meat, just going along with whatever the doctor decides is best, remember and tell yourself this will end. Some days you will even forget you ever had cancer. This will be you. Some days you will even think having cancer is a blessing because now you see things in a new way. You don't take things for granted, you don't get mad at stupid stuff anymore, you will have so much pleasure out of the smallest thing. You may see that now even, because suddenly you see how precious and fragile life is. It really stinks that you are going through this, you are brave and you can pm me anytime. (((HUGS!!!))) You can do this!

 

[buddy]

Just thinking about you today ....

 

[witzend]

I'll keep you and your family in my thoughts. How distressing for you all! There is so much more that they can do medically for you now than even a few years ago, so I'm sending positive vibes that everything will go well and smoothly for you.

 

[Calamity Jane]

Pepperidge,
One mantra that helps me get through difficult times is, "This too shall pass." It puts things in perspective, that this is happening to me at this point in time, and I will get through it with patience. Many times, hospitals offer chaplain support and room visits, etc. I'd take them up on that, and speak with someone there if you're comfortable. I know that's a calling and a vocation, and they're grateful to sit with you and chat if you like.

There's also a cute line from a movie out in theatres now called The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, where the young guy who is the proprietor of a somewhat shabby hotel in India has to manage the deflated expectations of visitors who booked their reservations there based on beautiful but somewhat misleading promises in their brochures. He tells the guests, "Everything will be allright in the end. So if it isn't allright, then it isn't the end."

 

[tiredmommy]

My mantra is: It is what it is". It helps me to keep realistic expectations in my life. I think of it as a pared down versions of the serenity prayer.

 

[pasajes4]

Lots of prayers for you and your loved ones.

 

[TerryJ2]

Thank you for the update, Pepperidge. And you are wise to focus on yourself. Many, many hugs as you take this journey.

I'm sure you know that you can start your own support board on a separate site, where it only contains updates about your treatment. One of those care.com sites of something.

I'll be thinking about you.

 

[DDD]

I'm rootin' for you. DDD

 

[PatriotsGirl]

I am so, so sorry...please take care of you. You will beat this!! You will be a survivor!

 

[busywend]

Sending more board juju your way!!!

 

[kiml]

my prayers go out to you. you sound like you are taking it one day at a time i hope you keep your spirits up

 

[TerryJ2]

Just checking in and sending hugs over the weekend.