Carri
Active Member
My 29 year old son walked away from his court ordered rehab mid November which means he is now facing 3 1/2 years in prison when he's picked up. I was devastated when I learned he walked out, not knowing where he was? And he was doing so well? what happened? Addiction happened. My circular thinking was out of control. After a few months, I was finally doing better with acceptance of the unknown. Then a month ago, I got a call from him to hear that he's in Hollywood, living in a car (he doesn't even have a drivers license), back to heroin and meth. At this point I just hope he gets arrested before he overdoses. I went to see him a week after he called me and it was so sad. Thin, nodding off, an empty look in his eyes. I honestly think the unknown was easier than knowing. He's been through countless rehabs, detox centers, sober livings, jail a half dozen times, but each new "low" proves to be equally hard for me. The son I knew, left me 10 years ago. Somehow, I manage to go to work everyday and act as if life is ok, but my son is on my mind all the time, wondering what's next. Will I hear from him? Has he been picked up? Has he OD'd? How did he get a car and a phone without money? I try to remember to pray, to snap myself out of it and that helps. Alanon, naranon and Im a member of AA myself so I'm doing all I can do. I was happy to find this support group to read other parents shares.
Sent using ConductDisorders mobile app
Sent using ConductDisorders mobile app